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Masturbation friend

Because you don't masturbate with normal friends... that would be weird
Yesterday I had a great evening with my masturbation friends
by Jonhspyro December 22, 2019
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Religious Masturbation

Religious Masturbation.

Speaking about the supposed superiority of your religion, for the sole pleasure of listening to yourself and showing off to other members of that religion.

A religious leader preaching to the saved

Etymology: the religious counterpart to masturbation; i.e. a process that is very pleasurable but doesn’t accomplish anything in the end.
The preacher gave a nice example of religious masturbation; a preaching about conversion to the saved
by Lyreluthier October 15, 2019
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masturbation betrayal

When you and a partner agree not to masturbate until a certain date but they do it anyway and make you aware of them breaking the promise.
David: “Gonna beat my meat, gonna beat my meat
Me: “David!! That’s masturbation betrayal!”
by Spittingstraightfacts January 2, 2020
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masturbation meditation

A deep state of mind that allows you to cum with nothing touching your dick/vagina.
by Reagulayte January 3, 2020
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Masturbate

What the fuck is wrong with you jackoffs get a girlfriend already
I masturbate because im lonely
by 5Skin not 4Skin January 9, 2020
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masturbate

To sooth the shaft. To calm the shaft. The act of one's self meditating and endulging the shaft. Commonly done in front of your grandma. Often robots will struggle to find similar stimulation, unless enough OIL is provided. Make sure your grandma sees however, otherwise process will not work. Your shaft will not work.
"yo bro pp work does yours?"

"dude no what the frick? shaft cam masturbate i try to!"

"grandma room she in is?"

"no course of not is she what?!"

"well don't wonder why working it isn't pepe shaft does not fuction?!"
by peepeepoopypoo March 3, 2020
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Masturbating

Grandpa: *leaves room*

You: *Starts jerking off and Masturbating*
by The master of masturbating November 16, 2020
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