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Couch Muffin

The really ugly and/or fat girl that hangs out with the very attractive girls. The attractive girls will still say that the unattractive girl is "cute". The couch muffin will go EVERYWHERE with the attractive ones.
"Dude, the chick Charlotte tried to hook me up with is a total couch muffin!"
"Man that sucks! Why does Charlotte have such an unattractive friend, when all the others are amazingly attractive?"
by TheCleanSanchez July 20, 2012
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Muffin Gasket

A Blowjob SO Fucking GOOD, the sheets are Sucked up in your ass.
I had a muffin gasket that required tying the sheet to the doorknob, to pull it free.
by gnelcajon June 9, 2015
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Piss muffin

When you run out of insults so you resort to combining a verb and a noun.
You know what Anthony! your a damn piss muffin
by minkycok June 9, 2020
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Ninja Muffin

A term for a obese, muffin shaped man that used as a derogatory term for people who can't do anything proactive
Do you know Carl? He still lives with his parents and is a total Ninja Muffin
by JoeJoeJoeJoeJonas October 3, 2016
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Muffin Gamer

One who games (usually GTA) while baking muffins for her grandkids.
by Beeg nene May 18, 2020
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Grumpy Muffin

When you and your loved one want to make sexy time and you have to poop, so you first grab frozen blueberries from freezer. Next, both get naked and and man sits on SO face facing towards SO feet and asks, "Will you lick my __________." Then the person getting licked takes a massive dump on the face of the SO and and quickly sprinkles blueberries on the poop, on the face. SO then cusses you out, wipes the poop from the eyes, and frowns.
Last night I asked my girlfriend to lick my nuts while I sat on her face, but I really had to go poop, too. I ended up pooping on her face and giving her a "Grumpy Muffin." She was not happy about it.
by Desperate Grandpa June 7, 2019
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Muffin Dick

When you cock is shorter then it is longer and wide like a tuna can. The shape of the cock looks like a muffin has been glued on to where the penis would be. This is achieved by being overweight, obese, or born with it. Also see the word chode.
Chase says to his fellow brosefs, "Bros check out my huge muffin dick when I slammed it in the card door this morning!"
by thesatisfyer January 19, 2015
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