One who secretly smokes methamphetamine out of hookers buttholes using a special ass bong device. It is like a normal bong except that the bottom is open, allowing the water chamber to be the rectum of said hooker.
Bro: "Yo man I heard Randy is a closet candy crusher. Dude smokes ice out of skank booty."
Bro2: "Damn, I knew I shouldn't have let him borrow my assbong. Oh well YOLO!"
Bro: "Nasty mang, you probably got mouth herpes now."
Bro2: "Damn, I knew I shouldn't have let him borrow my assbong. Oh well YOLO!"
Bro: "Nasty mang, you probably got mouth herpes now."
by the mysterious j September 7, 2013
Get the closet candy crushermug. to be in the closet is when everyone around you assumes you are straight, and you are left in an awkward position to decide to correct them or to stay quiet, there is a possibility they don't know either
conclusion if they avoid topics about being attracted to the opposite sex or the same sex, they might be a part of the LGBT community; however, you could never know
conclusion if they avoid topics about being attracted to the opposite sex or the same sex, they might be a part of the LGBT community; however, you could never know
random girl: "Okay girls, which guy in camp woods is the sexiest?"
girl in the closet: "I don't know, I haven't been paying attention"
short hair girl: "I think it's Marcus, what about you guys?"
girl in the closet: "I don't know, I haven't been paying attention"
short hair girl: "I think it's Marcus, what about you guys?"
by GayMoth October 27, 2022
Get the in the closetmug. Usually found in the Mid-west, a renouned breed of dog that resides 100% of it's life in a "Ginger"'s closet. The Closet Beagle and the Ginger usually bond for life, creating an inner world of fantasy and illusions. The most notable Closet Beagle was "Bagel", owned by a Ginger in Kansas, Bagel became the mascot of mid-west started "Kult", a transendental meditaion group whos core value set revolves around the Duality of Man.
by Quart-a-Milk April 2, 2010
Get the Closet Beaglemug. "It's been a tough week at the senate committee hearing. Can't wait to get some me time in my prayer closet."
by mcgruffallo March 27, 2019
Get the prayer closetmug. Engaging in sexual intercourse inside of a closet. In some cases it is a fetish for the thrill of hiding or getting "caught".
Eric and I were closet fucking because we didn't want his friend Jenny to hear us while she played call of duty. After the closet fucking he passed out and I built a snowman with Jenny.
by POTtybreak August 25, 2016
Get the closet fuckingmug. The kinda guy who lives on the East or West coast (usually high income) and reluctantly votes for the Republicans mostly because he doesn’t want to pay the Democrat’s proposed taxes. He often goes to great lengths to appease his liberal friends in conversation and not let them know who he voted for.
“That guy is such a closet Republican, there’s no way he’s pro taxes with a house like that.”
“He’s such an obvious appeaser, like some closet Republican trying to fit in.”
“He’s such an obvious appeaser, like some closet Republican trying to fit in.”
by Henrey S March 21, 2024
Get the Closet Republicanmug. person 1: let’s go to math
person 2: not today, I’m gonna water closet
person 1: oh where will you be?
person 2: the bathroom near room 302
person 2: not today, I’m gonna water closet
person 1: oh where will you be?
person 2: the bathroom near room 302
by Spooky Fuckass October 28, 2021
Get the Water Closetmug.