construction spatula

Any "tool" used by a homeowner during renovations that was never meant for construction. ie., using a pancake turner to remove old ceramic floor tiles.

We finally had to call a contractor to finish the kitchen because my husband ain't Tim the Tool Man and his construction spatulas ain't tools!

by cjc1 November 14, 2007

golden spatula

To piss on one's tongue before dragging it thru their ass

My ass itches will you give me a golden spatula?

by Little PP Willie July 13, 2015

spatula

An innocent-looking kitchen utensil commonly used to flip burgers which is actually part of an evil cult known as Spatualism. Spatulas are also in league with cats and spatuals, which are spatulas with eyes. The Catula is said to be the leader of the cats and spatulas. Fortunately, one can protect oneself against this menace by donning SXIPPG (Sporus Xylogenous Inhibitor Precautionary Protection Getup) gear, which consists of a frying pan/bowl/Santa hat as headwear, an empty bin bag for body protection, sunglasses and oven gloves. It is thought that cat-spatula information exchange is initiated by the cat rubbing its head against the spatula.

Warn all of your friends about the spatula menace.

by Wormy December 22, 2003

spatula attack

When a spatula is inserted up the rectum of an adversary.

Adversary: "Oh please don't spatula attack me"
Insertation: Schlurp
You: "You have been have been spatula attacked"
Adversary: "Ohhhhhhhhhh noooooooooooo i lost my SA virginity"

by JJ to the max March 10, 2008

Dirty Spatula

A "dirty spatula" is when a guy has junk shat upon, and then stomped upon with platform shoes.

It may not be the most profoundly disturbing or even most potentially damaging sexual act ever conceived, but I would not care to be on the receiving end of a "dirty spatula", if you know what I mean.

by Mattzog and Kilna January 12, 2009

cock spatula

The device used by older men for inserting their old saggy balls into a woman's vagina.

Hey guys, I used my new cock spatula last night to shimmy my old saggy cock and balls into my lady's punanny.

by cockspatula January 3, 2012

Trump spatula

An orange spatula with messy blonde hair.

Did you see Trump spatula?

by What knife? October 22, 2017