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chilli willy 

A rare mishap which occurs during an after dinner wank.

When wanking you notice a rather significant sensation. It may be intensely painful or pleasantly warm, hot even.

You worry for a moment and even panic as it feels as though your sausage is being cooked. You look at your hands which appear clean. After a moment it clicks. You put two and two together.

Your meal was rather spicy, containing large amounts of high potency chilli sauce. Some must have gotten on your hands.
Dave: Steve, come down and check this out!
Steve: I can't right now, I'll come down in a few.
Dave: You're going to miss it! The cat's stuck in the toilet!
Steve: I can't, I've got a severe case of chilli willy.

Steve: *limps down the corridor*
Dave: What's happened? Did you get hit in the balls?
Steve: No, I've got chilli willy you silly willy.
Related Words

chilli tattoo 

Typically, a chilli tattoo is used to symbolize sexuality and fertility. It is generally associated with passionate gay sex. Chilli tattoos tend to be found in intimate places but can also be found on other parts of the body such as the arms and legs.
You seen that dude's chilli tattoo? I bet he's got a tight arse!

chilli dog with cheese 

a standard chilli dog but to add the cheese, after pooping on her chest you masterbate on the poop until you ejactulate to make the cheese. You can then proceed with the titty fucking
I have that cunt a chilli dog...with cheese!!! OOHHHHH!!!

Chilli con carnage 

The stomach upset that follows eating spicy mexican food
After that mexican banquet the toilet suffered some chilli con carnage
Chilli con carnage by tashy76 March 12, 2009

chilli cheese fritos 

This only works for CHILLI CHEESE FRITOS. First, put your hand in the bag of chilli cheese fritos and rub the fritos in the bag with your fingers hard for 10 seconds. Quickly pull hand out of bag and sniff fingers (put nose VERY CLOSE to fingers). Now, if you have fingered a girl before and smelled your finger after, compare smells... what do they smell like you say? THEY'RE the SAME THING. Chilli cheese fritos are made primarily from vaginal eggs based on stem cell research. One egg is split to make 2, 2 makes 4, 4 makes 8, 8 makes 16, etc. Now do this a several hundred times and there you go, you have enough to fill millions of bags with your brand new tasty (not really) ingredient for the consumers' fritos. I hope you haven't eaten them before whoever is reading this, b/c the egg they produced the fritos came from a 350 pd. black lady who had her period the very week she donated her eggs. :-(

Seriously though, compare smells and you will be amazed...
"Dude, these CHILLI CHEESE fritos taste raunchy, I think I'm gonna puke."

"Dude that's cuz your eatin' a bag a vagina... a dirty old fat ladies vagina who basically had her period in that very bag yer holdin'."
chilli cheese fritos by MxPx_Fan December 28, 2005

chilli dipper 

The act of inserting ones thumb into another anus with chilli power on said digit
Last night me and the mrs had a chilli dipper
chilli dipper by Nasty bugger July 10, 2010