by Dont act like you know me November 03, 2006
A glorious little shit hole in Central Iowa, well known for not having anything to do, not having any place to work, and having lots of weed. If you live in Newton, Iowa, you are either addicted to drugs, too poor to move to a better place, or an old, retired person. Newton, Iowa offers a variety of activities for young people to do, such as smoke weed, drive around town for six hours with no destination (sometimes while smoking weed), go to the roller skating rink (if you're 12), smoke weed, attend one of the 50 churches, eat fast food, smoke weed, have unprotected sex with multiple partners (at once or separately), go bowling, or cook meth, just to name them all. Newton, Iowa also has a fairly new race track, so now everything is just FUCKING DANDY! You can't smoke a race track, so very few Newton teens enjoy it. Newton, Iowa is 30 miles away from everything. Avoid this town like the plague.
Welcome to Newton, Iowa. We hope you brought something to do.
Man 1: "Where are you from?"
Man 2: "Newton, Iowa."
Man 1: "Sucks to be you, man."
Man 2: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I'm so baked right now."
Man 1: "Where are you from?"
Man 2: "Newton, Iowa."
Man 1: "Sucks to be you, man."
Man 2: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I'm so baked right now."
by hodgepodge April 23, 2012
by misaki December 28, 2005
Where a woman gets double penetrated by 2 guys and their balls clash in the middle, essentially clacking like a set of Newtons Balls.
Dude, i had the weirdest sex last night. I was having a threesome with another chick and a dude and i swear there was some serious Newtons Balls flying about.
by Darryl Godoy May 20, 2008
A mediocre guy either in looks, personality, or both. And although he is average in every way, he thinks he is basically Ryan Reynolds.
While they may stay fig newtons forever it is possible for them to transform into something…like an Oreo…..or even a chocolate chip cookie.
While they are rare, fig newtons can also be female.
Examples: Jeff and Lester from the TV show Chuck
Dwight from the office.
Frollo from Hunchback of Norte Dame
Farquad from Shrek
Prince Charming from Shrek 2
Hans from Frozen
J’son (Starlord’s ‘Dad’) from Guardians of the Galaxy 2
Mr. Collins from Pride and Prejudice (honorable mention Mr. Wickham)
While they may stay fig newtons forever it is possible for them to transform into something…like an Oreo…..or even a chocolate chip cookie.
While they are rare, fig newtons can also be female.
Examples: Jeff and Lester from the TV show Chuck
Dwight from the office.
Frollo from Hunchback of Norte Dame
Farquad from Shrek
Prince Charming from Shrek 2
Hans from Frozen
J’son (Starlord’s ‘Dad’) from Guardians of the Galaxy 2
Mr. Collins from Pride and Prejudice (honorable mention Mr. Wickham)
Yeah, we talked a bit. But, he was a bit of a fig Newton so I’m not interested.
Oh, nah! He a fig newton.
He got that fig newton haircut.
He talks like a fig newton.
He was the figgiest of newtons.
Oh, nah! He a fig newton.
He got that fig newton haircut.
He talks like a fig newton.
He was the figgiest of newtons.
by notafignewton March 26, 2022
n. the phenomenon of excrement being forced from one's anus when lifting a sufficiently heavy object. The square of the velocity of the excrement is proportional to the mass of the object being lifted assuming constant excremental mass and constant acceleration of the object being lifted.
To every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction: or the forces of two bodies, one being the force required to move an object away from the center of a gravitational field and the other being poo directed toward the center of the same gravitational field, on each other are always equal and are directed in opposite directions.
To every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction: or the forces of two bodies, one being the force required to move an object away from the center of a gravitational field and the other being poo directed toward the center of the same gravitational field, on each other are always equal and are directed in opposite directions.
I had a bad case of the mudbutt earlier this morning and my situation just got so much worse. Newton's Log just caused me to spray a conical mist of liquid ass all over the room. I need to change my pants, underwear and the curtains.
by MicahtheDangerous January 24, 2011
When three or more willing homosexuals are having simultaneous anal intercourse(like so - >>>). The furthermost partys testicles swing away gaining momentum, swings back and hits the middle partys testicles, but due to the fact that the middle partys testicles are still in contact with the foremost partys testicles, it does not move but releases the energy into the foremost parties testicles swinging them forward, thus giving the "newtons cradle" effect.
Keith: Hey, have you seen that video online? its got the record for the most downloads in a single hour.
George: Nah what is it?
Keith: Its a video of Ricky Martin, Clay Aiken, Tom Cruise and Vin Diesel Newton Balling
George:WHAT THE F$#K!!
George: Nah what is it?
Keith: Its a video of Ricky Martin, Clay Aiken, Tom Cruise and Vin Diesel Newton Balling
George:WHAT THE F$#K!!
by testy365 July 02, 2009