Captain Numbnuts

Someone trying to act like the descendant of Captain Obvious

Person A: 2 plus 2 equal chair

Person B: You don't say! Thanks for the information, Captain Numbnuts!

by what do i care 125 February 4, 2022

Captain Cook'd

To get so altered on either alcohol or drugs that you discover a new land, like the English navy captain that discovered Australia

James: so are we gonna get Captain Cook'd tonight?
Scott: yeah I feel like exploring

by Uncle Querncey November 18, 2017

Sailing with the Captain

A Song by the Celtic rock band Dust Rhinos about Drinking lots of Captain Morgan Rum

I was sailing with the Captain, he'll show me the sights, I wish tomorrow morning would be as good as tonight

by btm321 December 1, 2010

Captain Quasar

The king of the fat kids. Bigger than a planet, so he lives in space. Often will eat planets for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. His special power is saying “bro” so loud, that it rips through the fabric of space time. He is a terrifying individual, who has struck fear into our galaxy. Rumor has it that an entire civilization that has developed on his stomach. He has 8 moons that orbit him.

“Marvelous! Look! It’s Captain Quasar!” A horrified alien yelled as Captain Quasar devoured his planet for a daily afternoon snack.

by Patriot77🇺🇸 January 3, 2020

Captain Russia

A guy with so much testosterone, he’ll make anyone his bitch. Usually, he looks like this: 👶🏼

Random #1: who would win in a fight; captain Russia, or _______?

Random #2: not even a question. Captain Russia.

by 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐁𝐚𝐠-𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐫 💰 🏃💨 August 30, 2022

Captain crunch

Is a flirtatious word that is for sure going to get the love of your life. Can also be used a sex symbol. The word just flows off the tongue so smoothly. It's a good cereal to share with your loved one to get into that spicy mood. Just say captain crunch and you automatically get her wet. Mostly for the strong dominant males to use to show that they are dominant and not a small spoon.

Grason: oh shit that girl be looking juicy
Henry: go get her man!
Grason: wait but how brother?
Henry: just go up to her with a worm on the string and say Captain crunch
Grason: ight *does it and finds the love of his life*
*they got married instantly *

by Scumyscummyboi October 17, 2019

Captain Steamer

The process of making stool in a cup and heating it in the microwave and pouring it upon someone

Dude i totally Captain Steamer ed her last night

by blaizacake May 23, 2012