split jerk

When you caress a males testicles and jerk him off at the same time.

Bethany gives a good split jerk!

by Boxlova October 22, 2020

split peen soup

When you're all horny in your trailer at night and want to have a special fap, so you sneak into kitchen and grab a can of Great Value sweet peas. You open the can with your Dollar Tree can opener and dowse the peas in canola oil. You then proceed to fuck the can of peas, but because all of the products you use are cheap and you are poor and stupid, there's a jagged piece of metal on the rim of the can that suddenly splits your dick down the middle. BAM! Now you've got split peen soup.

Girlfriend: We haven't had sex in two weeks. What's wrong with you?

Boyfriend: I didn't want to say anything, but last week I had three servings of split peen soup..."

by Jack Atrophy August 6, 2022

Fresh split

A recent break up

Is Lola single?
Yeah, her and her boyfriend are a fresh split, so she might be a little vulnerable right now.

by gemgalgetsheated February 1, 2020

Split Bombs

When are too angry and about to explode into somebody or a group of people and can’t just bear it but if you exploded out may be it won’t be good as may cause a lot

Speaker 1: Man I wanna kill Mary she broke up with me yesterday and she is acting normal right now ... I can remember also when she ....

Speaker 2: Man split bombs and let’s have a cool drink right now

by The killer zone December 30, 2020

split parsonality

Where someone acts arrogantly/annoyingly "pious 'n' preachy" ("I'm as honorable as a parson!") when publicly interacting with others, but is in reality a totally selfish/dishonest jerk in his private actions.

I somehow can never develop much respect for some highfalutin nose-in-the-air who claims to be a religious fanatic, but who also cannot appropriately handle even a simple moral-question situation --- talk about a split parsonality!

by QuacksO August 7, 2018

split the wizard

When you win a chili cook off with armadillo meat and cinnamon rolls (Kansas specialty)

"Hey Mayra, how we gonna split the wizard here?"

by Kansas Armadillo November 14, 2018

splitting my peas

a saying used when someone is very annoyed or in other words “triggered”

shaniac is really splitting my peas at this moment with his shenanigans

by fizzabelle January 3, 2018