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Obsessive Retarded

A person who, no matter what the situation, will choose the worst course of action. They appear to be compulsively driven to make poor choices, stupid comments and even worse life decisions.

This person is often caught up in small details that have little if nothing to do with the larger picture, or situation at hand.
WTF dude! This is the third time today you've got your dick caught in the vacuum. You must be Obsessive Retarded.
by Evil-Stevil November 9, 2010
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spontaneous retardation

An uncontrollable reaction to a particular event or stimulus where there is a total loss of most brain action.
1. As Bob and Joe were walking by the park, they had a sudden urge to play on the jungle gym due to spontaneous retardation.
by Better than Bacon? Impossible. January 10, 2010
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Certified Retard

Where you're a real and official retard, so if someone is being more than just a retard they are a
Certified Retard.
Random Guy: Saying Niqka is Racist
Another Random Guy: Your a Certified Retard
by datboi334 May 10, 2021
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dalton retard

Long Haired Truckee you will be able to find in any community that is classified as -Bogan- he will act stupid and do retarded thing to make you laugh
Look here comes Dalton retard, what's he gonna do this time???
by Blackhole Depression July 18, 2017
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Retarded Ava

A retard who only sucks her own jiblets. She exactly has 23 of them and they are all dried out. She waters them everyday but they won’t hydrate themselves. She will only eat rotten camel nuts to fulfill her dreams about having more nuts.
Jim: Ahh there is a retarded Ava, run because she will try to take your balls!!

Bob: It’s fine she already took mine, and it was painful!!
by Yert Skrt October 13, 2019
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Comidicly-Retarded

To be comidicly-retarded is to be completely unaware of the joke at hand. As the great General Sam once said "some of you are comidicly-retarded. Pronunciation is rather simple: com-ee-dic-ly re-tar-ded.
This fucking asshole here. Doesn't even get the joke and he sits there bobbin' his stupid head along. He's comidicly-retarded.
by iamthedizzione May 5, 2019
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Functional Retard

A person who is obviously weird, strange, and does retard-like things, but is a fully functional human being, or whatever species they are. Usually they are assholes, but they're usually enjoyable and funny.
Example 1)

*Gonzo screams "Dick Waterfall" in the middle of an instructional period*

Jessica: What is wrong with that man

Amber: I don't know, but he must be a pretty functional kind of retard.

Example 2)

*Actual disabled child walks by*

Jessica: He's probably not a very functional retard

Amber: Dude, that's my brother.
by ThatFuckWad December 4, 2014
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