Step up to the microphone

euphemism - oral sex, giving head, blow job
technique of singing kareoke & playing the pink oboe are strikingly similar.
i.e. grab the microphone with both hands and belt out some classics.

That bird from last night was frigid, she didnt even step up to the microphone.

I pulled a dog last night, but fair play, she stepped up to the microphone and sung a few hits.

by DownUnder1 February 11, 2010

microphone diarrhea

a diarrhea-like medical condition in which the sufferer, usually a corrupt incompetent politician, feels the frequent and urgent need to go a nearby microphone or camera for a pathetic little press conference.

lately adam schiff and nancy pelosi seemed to have been suffering from microphone diarrhea

by Sexydimma November 30, 2019

microphone diarrhea

a diarrhea-like medical condition in which the sufferer, usually a corrupt incompetent politician, feels the frequent and urgent need to go a nearby microphone or camera for a pathetic little press conference.

lately adam schiff and nancy pelosi seemed to have been suffering from microphone diarrhea

by Sexydimma November 14, 2019

brown microphone

To sing or serenade into one's bumhole therefore mimicking the action of singing into a microphone that happens to be brown. Often ex-American/Canadian Idol stars are reduced to using the brown microphone since it is the only audience that is attentive.

Tariq: "Last nightt Clay Aiken sang an incredible melody into m'a brown microphone. It was stuck in m'a head awl day!"
Dwayne: "Damn nigga, that's gross!"

by CockBlocker December 14, 2008

D.A.W.M. (Dork with a Microphone)

a person who uses a microphone in mic enabled online multiplayer games to talk, play recordings, or do various other things completely irrelevant to the game at hand.

it is reserved for people who do nothing but play music, brag about various things, or berates fellow teammates for doing nothing all the while they had a mic and did nothing useful with it.

"you D.A.W.M. (Dork with a Microphone)" or "what a D.A.W.M. (Dork with a Microphone)"

by porcupyne November 30, 2009

Micraphone

Micraphone is a poorly designed crappy microphone that can breaks easily
Billy: This old microphone isn't working anymore because I can’t sing a song
Bob: you’re using that old crappy micraphone

Billy: okay I’ll throw it away and get a new one soon

micraphone microphone

by Quasarius September 15, 2021

Microphone Molesting

When you're face timing someone and the microphone is being viciously blown into, rubbed on, etc.

"Stop microphone molesting, my ears hurt!"

by A Collection of Satanists October 9, 2017