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cryptitis

medical condition in which the anus and the area around it become swollen and painful.
"stop acting so uptight..."

"I can't, it's my cryptitis"
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Cryptitis

A condition where a person looks at digital shit coins all day, all night and rarely sleeps. They try and "daytrade" only to feed the meme coin whales their liquidity. This ends up worsening the condition to where to person eyes turn blood shot red, they do not care to get laid anymore, and they also use a drug called Hopeium which only worsens the condition of looking at charts all day and trading them... Severe Cryptitis symptoms include but not limited: blood shot eyes, the continuing of emptying one's wallet, suicide, heavy crying, feelings of ones asshole hurt, an irrational fear of walking carpets ("rugs") and a severe addiction to hopeium. There is no known cure for this condition, and it is rapidly spreading with one rug pull after another.
That streamer has severe cryptitis.
by One Legged Ant June 9, 2022
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cryptidist

Someone who is in the subculture Cryptidcore.
Luna: I love cryptids
Jake: so your are a Cryptidist
by Ginger The Chamrosh January 16, 2021
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Slurryitus Cystitis

Vaginal infection caused by not changing your soiled underwear quick enough after a severe dose of Slurryitus. Female only disease, (and possibly post op Transexuals).
Susan, (whilst in the toilet cubicle): " AAAAAAARGH!!! Fuck it stings when I piss and my flaps stink of shit!!".

Judith, (from the next door cubicle): " You should have changed your panties when you shat yourself in the paste room yesterday. I warned you about Slurryitus Cystitis. I am a first aider you know.
by Upchucker March 31, 2009
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Cryptotian

A person that puts money into the crypto currency market with the expectation of earning a profit.
I just became a Cryptotian last month.
by Dejavu79 February 6, 2018
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Cryptonise

Speaking to someone in a cryptic manner causing them to become confused and as a consequence they then unveil their ultimate weakness. This word originates from the word kryptonite which is superman’s ultimate weakness - obvs.
Alphy always tries to cryptonise me so that he can find out my ultimate weakness. It doesn’t work, as I invented the word!!
by Son Yin no G Hine January 18, 2021
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Honeymoon Cystitis

Urinary tact infection caused by repeated vigorous vaginal sexual intercourse. (You're fuckin' too much!)
"Motherfucker!" she shrieked. "I have a burning piss hole again! Dr. Hurtz will no doubt say 'Congratulations! You have Honeymoon Cystitis AGAIN!'"
by Pfc. Snowball July 11, 2006
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