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Soccer Mom Assault Vehicle (S.M.A.V.) 

anything associated with the "mini van" body and the bullshit ridiculously easy to drive vehicle, its so easy to drive because of the car chassis it sits on, the full power brakes, its surrounded by glass, its so easy to steer. Anything associated but not limited to Ford Windstar, Chrysler Town and Country, Plymoth Voyager, Chevrolet Uplander or Venture, Dodge Caravan, Mazda MPV, Toyota Sienna, Nissan Quest, and last and most definatly deserves to be least Kia Sedona because of its complimentary paper plate brake rotors, toilet paper roll drivetrain, twizzlers for spark plug wires, cheap supermarket send a kid to camp for $1 plastic bags for air bags, and coca cola can hull.
Yo look at that Soccer Mom Assault Vehicle (S.M.A.V.) im sure glad i dont drive one of those
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soccer mom save 

When you stop short while driving and throw your arm out to restrain the passenger from being thrown through the windshield à la soccer mom
Today some asshole cut me off and while I was braking I totally soccer mom saved Nadia.
soccer mom save by Bernay March 4, 2009

soccer mom speedball 

It's a new epidemic: in the teachers lounge, all women book clubs, ballet studios, dojos - it's being called a "soccer mom speedball", which is a large starbucks coffee and a klonopin tablet, a medication used for anxiety. is your mom taking part?
soccer mom speedball by bleeeweee September 14, 2010

KC Soccer Mom Slam 

When a group of 8-10 men jizz on a soccer ball, and then one of the dude's kicks said soccer ball into soccer mom's face. This is so KC.
Dude, I just KC Soccer Mom Slammed that bitch.
KC Soccer Mom Slam by Theodore823 August 29, 2010

Soccer Mom (sex position)

While an older female is giving fellatio she is riding the trailer hitch on her SUV. She has all of the balls covered.
I had a wild night with that milf from the bar. We went out back and she totally started to Soccer Mom me. Soccer Mom (sex position)

soccer mom slizzard 

Slizzard as in the song "like a G6"... soccer mom slizzard is when your at a party with 30+ year old woman or MILFS and they are all getting drunk as fuck, and crawling all over the younger men. Everyone has experienced women doing this. If you can think of a time you have never been with woman getting soccer mom slizzard you are a liar.
Yo man, Cindy's mom was so soccer mom slizzard when I banged her.

I was at a party with all these milfs and they were soccer mom slizzard.

That chick is soccer mom slizzard.

Soccer mom stick 

Another name for a 510 thread battery. Refers to the idea that most white, middle class mothers, specifically ‘soccer moms’, prefer vaping THC cartridges rather than smoking due to the discrete nature of vaping.
“Do you really think you can get stoned in the middle of the grocery store?”
“Yeah it’s cool I got a soccer mom stick”