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flexible container of Massengill 

A polite way of saying the word, "douchebag"; it can be used in typed text or spoken.
Linda is such a flexible container of Massengill that it ain't even funny!!!
She did the most unfeminine thing in the world and plugged up all of the shitbowls at the rest stop with paper towels!

untruthful flexible container of feces 

A polite way of saying the phrase, "lying sack of shit"; it can be used in typed text or spoken.
You claim that Linda stuffs Scottowels down the can?!?
Why Josh, you untruthful flexible container of feces!!!

contained randomness

1.an organized cult of enlightened individuals who have mastered the art of containing even the most extreme influences of humour without showing the slightest sign of and expression

2.performing acts of randomness that is difficult to notice as it is performed very quickly, and is undetectable as the person(s), contain there laughter, no matter how extreme the humour
"damn rorz, you are the jedi of contained randomness, how do you do it?"

Cuntaggedon 

When you see everyone you hate in one day, that day can only be described as cuntaggedon.

"Now I hate everyone at work everyday has become cuntaggedon"
"Now I hate everyone at work everyday has become cuntaggedon"
Cuntaggedon by mingsly September 29, 2014

Contrived 

Something that is created in a way that feels artificial and unrealistic, as apposed to something that arises spontaneously through nature.
Waluigi was only created for the purposes of giving Wario a Tennis Partner; He only exists to be Roster Filler. Contrived because he wasn't created organically through the creators own passion.
Contrived by DeScRiPtOr92584 August 19, 2018

container ass 

Container ass is used to describe an ass that only looks good because of the pants being worn. The definition works two ways in that the ass only looks good when in a container (pants) and the pants contain(h)er ass.
Damn, she has a hot ass! Yea, but take off the pants and I'll bet it's a container ass.