At the Movie theater, Your girlfriend cuts a hole in the bottom off the bucket of popcorn and places his penis threw the hole. She then sticks her hand in the popcorn and gives him a handjob...
international beat-off day is an offensive term because on these days otherwise productive male members of the North American workforce simply sit at home doing diddly-squat and beat off to porn. Too bad Thanksgiving is not celebrated in Canada during the month of Brovember.
Psychiatrist: what did you do last night?
Me: I spent like 5 hours performing an Urban beat off.
Psychiatrist: again? What definition this time?
Me: The Boston Pancake got me so horny that I beat my little dick around til it was black and blue.