Polishing the spear 

To wank off and make your spear "Shine"
AKA Wacking off
Masturbating
And SLAPPING THE SHALOM

Isaac B "Jonah WTF are u doing1111!"
Jonah B "Im playing skyrim and polishing the spear!"

Polishing the spear by chodechopper October 16, 2014

Polishing the gnome 

Masturbating in the garden!

I was just out watering the roses and polishing the gnome

Polishing the gnome by Green Fingered December 24, 2014

Polishing your knob 

The act of polishing and or shining another person's knob, a.k.a., their penis tip.

"Ey Boy i'll polish dat knob for fitty cent."

"That Bob Dylan is so hot I'd polish his knob fo free!"

"Got a knob? I'll polish it"

"What was Becky doing out back with Josh?"
"Oh I caught them last time, she was polishing his knob"
"Wow..."
"Yeah she did a good job from what I saw. That knob was clean as a whistle."

"So, you want a job. What are you good at?"
"Polishing your knob."

Polishing your knob by Tats McGats February 18, 2012

polishing the one eyed gopher 

To masterbate while driving

You cannot imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice while polishing the one eyed gopher when you're doin' seventy-five in an eighteen-wheeler

polishing the one eyed gopher by Ninety2iamsam June 20, 2006

Polishing the Canoe

The act of female masturbation.

Shawna became overwhelmed by her fantasies of Rick and began polishing the canoe furiously.

Polishing the Canoe by ricktheaddj October 8, 2009

Polishing The Pewter 

Another one of the countless names for masturbating. Derived from the movie "Almost Heroes" staring Chris Farley (RIP), in which him Matthew Perry portary Lewis and Clark. However, one should note that in the movie the phrase is not used to describe masturbation, but the various acts of sex. Over time the phrase has changed meaning.

10 bucks says he Polishes The Pewter thinking of that night those chicks picked HIM up.

Polishing The Pewter by Cambone September 8, 2005

Polishing the Cannonball 

Wasting time on a task that does not add value; making irrelevant improvements. Usually work related.

You're spending a lot of time on getting that power point presentation looking nice. It's really polishing the cannonball.

Polishing the Cannonball by roccoSD August 22, 2007