The resident football team of Edwardsville
High School, nicknamed the Tigers.
The fans are terrible. Every year they
will claim the team is the best in all of Illinois, and that nobody is going to stop them. Every single year they crush the Collinsville "football team" and claim that that that validates their
faith in the team, even though Collinsville hasn't won a football
game since the Coolidge administration.
Every year they build up a decent record that's inflated by wins against terrible opponents, lose extremely winnable games against mediocre teams, and barely make the playoffs. They immediately proceed to get curb stomped by East St. Louis in the first round.
Student: The Edwardsville Tigers Football Team are the greatest football team ever assembled! There's no way we're losing to East Lou this year!
Underage
beer liaison: Okay... So, how much whiskey do you think you're gonna need for the
game?
Student: I don't need whiskey, I need champagne! Those Flyer Fuckers are going DOWN!
Underage
beer liaison: Trust me. You're gonna need whiskey.