noun.
variations: Hockeymom
Complete opposite of a Soccermom. A Hockey mom takes only her kid to hockey practice and let the neighbor's kid walk because he is on the other team.
The Hockey mom uses the following tactics to ensure her kid plays well:
- big breakfasts consisting of a lot of cooked animals
- threatens to beat her kid if he does not score a goal (or lets a goal in, if the kid is a goalie)
- yells at her kid to score when at the game
- yells profanities at the other players
The Hockey mom usually drives a pickup truck and lives on a farm. She is a stay at home mom with a large family (usually 7 kids, 3 girls, 4 boys. All boys play hockey)
The Hockey mom carries these
interesting traits:
- will cut off any SUV sporting a "IM A SOCCERMOM"
bumper sticker
- usually has a chipped upper front tooth
- usually
dirty blonde with long hair parted in the middle
- wears tight levi's jeans from ther high school days in the 80's
- listens to REO Speedwagon and Aerosmith
- Drinks vodka and rum and coke
- Married to a
redneck farmer that she met in high school. He inherited the farm and his mom was also a hockey mom.
Totally opposite of Soccermom: See Soccermom
Johnny: Hey! Those two women are
fighting!
Billy: That ain't no women, those are our moms!
Johnny: damn, dude, my mom just
beat the shit out of your mom!
Billy: That's cause my mom is a Soccermom
Johnny: Yeah, and my mom is a Hockey mom
Billy (sobbing): yeah....
