a roberts

a roberts is a person of high stature. they win everything and if they don’t get their way they won’t try. a perfect example of a roberts is ben roberts. a roberts also makes varsity everything freshman year. they are also the best at everything they do.

“omg did ben just score 69 goals in one game” ~sean
“of course he did, he’s a roberts” ~ur mom

a roberts by haydnhulbs October 17, 2019

Doing a Roberts 

Wandering aimlessly around the office, avoiding work and occasionally pretending to make a 'very important' phonecall

"Where is he? This report was supposed to be finished an hour ago!"
"He's was here a second ago - He must be doing a roberts"

Doing a Roberts by chichesterfield October 5, 2007

taking a roberts 

taking a shit

i'm takin' a roberts
don't forget to wipe your roberts

taking a roberts by pimpinat31 April 29, 2003

Pulling a Roberts

Attempting to quote from memory a short, famous passage or pledge in front of lots of (millions of) people and screwing it up royally.

Barry: The Chief Justice tried to swear me in at the ceremony without a notecard and fucked it all to hell! Some people think it was MY fault!

Michelle: Oh, don't worry baby. Everyone knows he was pulling a Roberts.

Pulling a Roberts by Neptunium January 28, 2009

Pull a Chris Roberts 

To promise something and fulfill it a long time after it was promised.

Hey mate, i've heard that John just pull a Chris Roberts.

Pull a Chris Roberts by DerBauer December 25, 2022

Doing a John Roberts 

You are doing a John Roberts when you try to give both sides something to call a win.

Guy A: "What to do now? My daughter wants to visit Disneyland but my wifey complains it's too expensive for us to go there".
Guy B: "Well, buy some Disney movie tickets and save money that way. Your daughter will be happy and your wifey won't complain anymore."
Guy A: "You want me doing a John Roberts, right?"
Guy B: "Yeah, that's a foolproof plan. Trust me!"
*Divorce triggering*

Doing a John Roberts by SupremeCourtNerd July 16, 2020

Have a degree from Oral Roberts 

1. A euphemism for someone who gives really good head.

2. The ability to fuck up everyone's good plans by virtue of just being present at all.

1. Guy to a girl after receiving head: Do you have a degree from Oral Roberts? Because you can suck more than my 2021 March Madness Bracket.

2. Guy 1: Why did you invite bad-breath Brian to the party?
Guy 2: I didn't think he would be a problem since he just stands in the corner.
Guy 1: Bad-breath Brian has a degree from Oral Roberts, including him at all is going to fuck up our plans!

Have a degree from Oral Roberts by Aethelwulf March 21, 2021