westfalia's definitions

nowhere story

A tale or recount of an event or events that doesn't ever reach a particular point or meaning.

Duder 1: "So the other day I went into Foot Locker and saw a girl working there so I thought it was Lady Foot Locker, but it turns out it wasn't."

Duder 2: "Wow dude, thanks for that nowhere story."

by westfalia December 16, 2009

suicide pause

A long period of painful, awkward silence when you're talking with your girl about something important. These long pauses make you seriously consider suicide.

Duder: "I don't want you to stop flirting with asian guys because of me, I just want you to understand how I feel"

Chica : "Yeah, I know"

*long silence*

Duder: "What are you thinking?"

Chica: "About what I should do"

*long silence*

Duder: "Damn, another suicide pause. Let's wrap this up before I go off the deep end."

by westfalia December 30, 2009

Pavlov's Dougie

When a person hears the song "Teach Me How to Dougie" by Cali Swag District, and has a pavlov's dog-type reaction, being un-able to do anything but the "Dougie" dance. This term references an experiment by Ivan Pavlov in which dogs were trained to salivate upon hearing the ringing of the bell.

Duder 1: "I know what will get him going."

Duder 2: "Yea put on that Dougie son. He can't resist them shits. Might as well call that kid Pavlov's Dougie."

(song starts playing)

Duder 3: "Oh damn you guys." (starts Dougie-ing)

by westfalia May 31, 2011

emeriltator

A person that imitates Emeril Lagasse while they are cooking. Examples include: throwing a kitchen towel over their shoulder and yelling "Bam!" every time they add spices and seasonings to things.

Duder 1: "Smells good dude. Why do you have that towel on your shoulder?"

Duder 2: "What am I supposed to do with it man? Hold on gotta add some oregano.....BAM!"

Duder 3: "You're pretty much an emeriltator dude."

by westfalia December 11, 2009

weed mentor

A person in your life (usually older than you by a few years) that takes you under their wing and teaches you all they know about marijuana. Lessons include: 'how to smoke', 'how to roll a joint', 'how to satisfy the munchies' and 'how to make your own bong'.

Duder 1: "So what are we doing here at your friends place?"

Duder 2: "Check this."

Duder 1: "Whoa dude is that what I think it is? I don't know how to use that."

Duder 2: "Don't worry man, I'll be your weed mentor."

by westfalia January 13, 2010

sprung phase

The time early on in a new relationship where a man or woman will do anything to see their gilfriend or boyfriend. You can tell a person is in their sprung phase if they get jealous of their gilfriend or boyfriend's ex, drop in on their gilfriend or boyfriend at work or can't stop showing pictures of their new girlfriend or boyfriend to every one they know.

Duder 1: "Check out my new girl's facebook. She's so hot huh?"

Duder 2: "Sure dude, whatever you say. I'm not into the asians like you are."

Duder 1: "What? Everybody else said she's such an upgrade. Wanna go visit her? She works at Macy's."

Duder 2: "Whoa, you just want to drop in on her? You're definitely still in the sprung phase."

by westfalia January 13, 2010

booze bouncer

A powerful guy you tell to watch out for you and your buddies to make sure you don't get too fucked up drunk.

Duder 1: "Ok guys let's make sure we get at least 2 songs down when we jam this weekend."

Duder 2: "Yea for sure. I hope we don't get too fucked up though."

Duder 3: "Oh you know what we need? We need a booze bouncer! How about Rich?"

by westfalia January 19, 2010