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Definitions by telephony

Textie McTexterson 

Somebody who spends almost every waking minute on his or her cellular telephone handset texting.
Alex, I've picked out a cellular telephone phone just for you, Mr. Textie McTexterson!!!
Textie McTexterson by Telephony January 9, 2019
Simply put, urine (piddle, potty, pee, micturition, whiz, poddy, wee-wee, etc.)
That urinal is unflushed; it's full of dark yellow pizzle!
pizzle by Telephony December 24, 2018

Meat Santa 

A butcher; especially in the month of December.
{Butcher}: Here's your prime rib, all wrapped up real nice.
{Customer}: Thank you, and have a merry Christmas, Meat Santa!
Meat Santa by Telephony December 5, 2018

cucking fold 

How one might type the phrase, "fucking cold" in order to defeat the inbuilt censor found on many online BBSs and fora (the correct pluralisation of the word forum) or to throw your parents for a loop when text messaging them.

It is similar in principle to using the phrase, "ducking fisgusted" instead of, "fucking disgusted."
{On an SMS text session}
Mom: Jessica, can you swing by the store on your way in and get taper powels, poliet taper, light blubs, and kăt fūd?
{Jessica}: Sorry mom, it's cucking fold out here and I'm coming home straight away!
cucking fold by Telephony December 2, 2018

doughnut 

The correct way to spell this word; it is not spelled, "donut" as many people (and even some well-known doughnut shops) spell it.
(from text messaging)
{Rod}: Hey Todd, let's hit the Dunkin Donuts on the way home.
{Todd}: It's doughnuts you retard!!!
doughnut by Telephony November 14, 2018

mouthdouche 

What some people call mouthwash -- a liquid (frequently composed of a high percentage of alcohol which often causes a burning sensation) that you swirl around inside your mouth and spit into the sink approx. half a minute later.
{Greg}: Suze, can you please pick up a bottle of mouthdouche while you're at the store?
{Susan}: Sure thing Greggo!!!
mouthdouche by Telephony November 14, 2018

sandwitch 

(also written as, "sand witch")
Quite literally, a witch who lives in the sand. The sandwitch is most commonly found living 2.4 meters under the sands in the sub-Saharan region of Africa though they may be found in virtually any sandy location such as beaches and golf course bunkers.

Sandwitches don't cast frequent spells; though they are known on occasion to cause cause cats to meow at the moon.
{Drake}: Why is that silly cat looking at the moon and meowing at it?
{Josh}: I dunno. Must be a sandwitch nearby.
sandwitch by Telephony November 13, 2018