teddeadman's definitions
Managment style that involves jumping from issue to issue constantly, never staying long enough to actually fix any issue. Similar to "putting out fires" and "drive by management"
Drone1: "How's work today man?"
Drone2: "Crappy, I can't seen to get the yellow stripes straight in the parking lot, they keep smearing"
Drone1: "Stripes? Yesterday you were working on new security code feature for the server what happened to that?"
Drone2: "Boss got his beamer dented in the lot and Lillypad Management is what happened"
Drone1: "Ribbit dude!"
Drone2: "Crappy, I can't seen to get the yellow stripes straight in the parking lot, they keep smearing"
Drone1: "Stripes? Yesterday you were working on new security code feature for the server what happened to that?"
Drone2: "Boss got his beamer dented in the lot and Lillypad Management is what happened"
Drone1: "Ribbit dude!"
by TedDeadMan January 25, 2013
Get the Lillypad Managementmug. Recession speak for "I've been out of work for some time and am bumming around looking for the end of the rainbow while pretending to be cool and in-charge so as not to bruise my fragile over inflated ego"
Office Drone: "Hey bud, how's it going with you?"
Former Coworker: " Aw, it's All Good, I'm just kickin it Reaquiring My Life Goals, finding a path"
Office Drone: "Oh, I see.....you're trying out "Bum" as a lifestyle for awhile then?"
Former Coworker: "Yeah....you got a quarter I could borrow?"
Former Coworker: " Aw, it's All Good, I'm just kickin it Reaquiring My Life Goals, finding a path"
Office Drone: "Oh, I see.....you're trying out "Bum" as a lifestyle for awhile then?"
Former Coworker: "Yeah....you got a quarter I could borrow?"
by TedDeadMan September 2, 2010
Get the Reaquiring My Life Goalsmug. When to many awesome things are combined causing a tear in the fabric of space/time and the subsequent annihilation of the known universe. Note: possible source for the "Big Bang"
Dude: "Watch this; I'm gonna paste a pic of Chuck Norris on this T. Rex having a lightsaber duel with LOL cat on top of a stealth bomber with the "your awesome" dog being the ref....."
Dudette: "NO!" as she pushes him away from the keyboard
Dudette: "You could have started an Awesomeocalypse!"
Dude: "Duuuudddeeee.....sorry.....to much awesomeness"
Dudette: "NO!" as she pushes him away from the keyboard
Dudette: "You could have started an Awesomeocalypse!"
Dude: "Duuuudddeeee.....sorry.....to much awesomeness"
by TedDeadMan August 16, 2010
Get the Awesomeocalypsemug. A meal consisting of a wide variety of foods that don't normally go together
Often created from a week or more of leftovers
Often created from a week or more of leftovers
Hubby: "Hon, what are we havin for din-din?"
Wifey: "Chicken nuggets, kung pao, hot dogs, flafel, carrots, hard boiled eggs and some pretzels"
Hubby: "Ah, Conglomomeal, the breakfast of champions"
Wifey: "Chicken nuggets, kung pao, hot dogs, flafel, carrots, hard boiled eggs and some pretzels"
Hubby: "Ah, Conglomomeal, the breakfast of champions"
by TedDeadMan September 15, 2010
Get the Conglomomealmug. Purposely performing a task so poorly as to discourage being assigned this task again, but not poorly enough to be fired
Cube Dweller1: Dude, writing the weekly report is a sucky job; how do I get out of it?
Cube Dweller2: Just screw up some people's names and swap some people's tasks, nobody will want you to do it again
Cube Dweller1: Ahh....Strategic Incompetence....a fine idea....my inner slacker is jumping for joy!
Cube Dweller2: Just screw up some people's names and swap some people's tasks, nobody will want you to do it again
Cube Dweller1: Ahh....Strategic Incompetence....a fine idea....my inner slacker is jumping for joy!
by TedDeadMan September 4, 2009
Get the Strategic Incompetencemug. Act of transfering a duty or task to a worker not actually in the chain of command of the assigner, always without knowlege of the worker's superior. Normally done to seem like a promotion or reward for the worker but really is a way to pawn of unwanted work. Dutiful worker sets precident of doing the work before his boss finds out and thus it becomes a permanent part of the worker's duties.
Useful when strategic incompetence is unsucessful.
A required skill in today's corporate world
Useful when strategic incompetence is unsucessful.
A required skill in today's corporate world
Accountant: Dude - your so great I'm gonna award you the Data Collection Champion position
Drone 1: Whoa, I'm stoked, a promotion; what do I do
Accountant: Oh, lots of things, like collect all receipts and invoices and turn them in to me each month - very important
Drone 1: Awesome, I'm moving up!
Accountant: One other thing, I don't want anyone to get jealous of your new work so don't tell your boss, he might try to keep you down, and keep doing all your other great work
Drone 1: Rock-On.....like spy work
Drone 2: Duuuude...you just got stealth delegation 'd
Drone 1: Whoa, I'm stoked, a promotion; what do I do
Accountant: Oh, lots of things, like collect all receipts and invoices and turn them in to me each month - very important
Drone 1: Awesome, I'm moving up!
Accountant: One other thing, I don't want anyone to get jealous of your new work so don't tell your boss, he might try to keep you down, and keep doing all your other great work
Drone 1: Rock-On.....like spy work
Drone 2: Duuuude...you just got stealth delegation 'd
by TedDeadMan July 11, 2011
Get the Stealth Delegationmug. Dude: Nice computer, pretty tricked out
Nerd: Yeah, its got a 6x core overlclocked water cooled processer with 4 GPUs and a solid state drive. Gets me 3 more frames per second !
Dude: Whoa, how much that set you back
Nerd: Bout $7k
Dude: Dude...that is some serious Nerd Tax
Nerd: Yeah, its got a 6x core overlclocked water cooled processer with 4 GPUs and a solid state drive. Gets me 3 more frames per second !
Dude: Whoa, how much that set you back
Nerd: Bout $7k
Dude: Dude...that is some serious Nerd Tax
by TedDeadMan July 5, 2010
Get the Nerd Taxmug.