Definitions by ssCape

ruler eyes 

Trait possessed by a person likely spawned from shallow gene pool whereby a standard 12" ruler may be placed between the eyes without touching either orb.

Whoa, that Rev. Jackson has ruler eyes. Any farther apart and he's a flounder.

ruler eyes by ssCape August 7, 2013

Booty batter

A bowel movement with the consistency of a chocolate Mister Softee ice cream cone.

It took nearly a whole roll of Charmin to address my booty batter in the restroom; must have been the clams casino and pesto.

Booty batter by ssCape August 7, 2013

Hogjam 

A large collection of police vehicles congregated in a relatively small area thereby impeding the flow of traffic.

Sorry I was late to work boss but there was a hogjam in front of the Krispy Kreme no doubt caused by the Hot Doughnuts Now sign being illuminated.

Hogjam by ssCape August 7, 2013