cork

what you must insert to keep the hamster from escaping your ass.

He's in, now cork it before he gets out!

by Mike Oxhard July 13, 2006

dilbert

1. someone who works in a cubicle at a mind-numbing job.

2. a job that is good practice for being dead or in a coma.

Don't ask him about his job, he's a dilbert.

by Mike Oxhard July 13, 2006

near queer

Not quite openly gay or consciously aware of being gay.

He said he's not gay, but he's sure as hell near queer.

by Mike Oxhard July 11, 2006

metrosexual

A flaming, obvious homosexual, who nonetheless claims to be hetero, fooling only women, but not gay or straight men. May still be in denial about his sexual orientation, but can't suppress the fashion sense.

GIRL: He's not gay, he's a metrosexual!
GUY: Oh, yeah? Has he tried to have sex with you?
GIRL: No, he said he doesn't want to ruin our friendship...

by Mike Oxhard July 10, 2006

cottage cheese diet

1. the habit of only having sex with women so obese they have severe cellulite (origin: the cottage cheese appearance of cellulite.

2. anything a woman who has severe cellulite eats .

1. She's too skinny for him, he's on a cottage cheese diet.

2. Damn, women on a cottage cheese diet shouldn't wear bikinis!

by Mike Oxhard July 12, 2006

jingle fever

The attraction a woman feels to a man with a lot of money. (origin: relates to jingling sound of many coins in a pocket).

As soon as she saw his Maserati, she got jingle fever.

by Mike Oxhard July 10, 2006

cornhole

n. anus.

v. insert in anus

(origin: inspired by widespread use of corncobs for both toilet paper and butt plugs in the South and Midwest)

n. Wipe your cornhole before ya pull up yur pants, Ennis.

v. You cornhole that pig, and yur buying it.

by Mike Oxhard July 12, 2006