itsmenotjames's definitions

Impossible Bridge

A bridge that is impossible (impassable) during high water.

We just drove over the impossible bridge.

by itsmenotjames December 7, 2024

Why it's christmas

You should use a condom because it's christmas. Why? Because ho ho ho. (used when explaining protected sex to teens)

I just had to give the talk to my son and tell him why it's Christmas.

by itsmenotjames December 7, 2024

Squeal of Fortune

When you take a spinning wheel with names on it and spin it. The person whose name it lands on gets fucked by a horse and once they are dead, 4 dudes munge them.

Last night, we had a fun time after Leigh got the squeal of fortune

by itsmenotjames December 6, 2024

Family Feud

You have 10 dudes to gangbang a girl where all of them cum inside of her. And you wait 2 months and see who the Father of the baby is.

I invited my friends over to play family feud with my girlfriend.

by itsmenotjames December 6, 2024

Alaskan Snowsock

When you cum in a sock, let it ferment for 2 days, then stick a popsickle stick in it, freeze it, take it out of the sock and stick it in your girl's pussy and let it impregnate her.

I gave your mom the alaskan snowsock last night

by itsmenotjames December 6, 2024

Nitrogen Bomb

Where you fill someone's asshole with Liquid Nitrogen and tape it shut until it soaks into their rectum. Then you wrap your dick in breath strips and fuck them until they obtain frostbite throughout their intestines and your dick falls off.

My girl was pissing me off so I made her do the nitrogen bomb with me.

by itsmenotjames December 6, 2024

Colombian Chokehold

When a girl farts, shits, cums, and queefs into a jar. Then you let it ferment for 3 months and sniff it to get high.

God damn that Colombian Chokehold got me high last night.

by itsmenotjames December 6, 2024