Definitions by Velvet Tongue
Cumhold
1. The effect of dried cum on hair, holding styling in place. Depending on the volume and consistency of the cum, hold can be light, moderate, or heavy.
2. The adhesive effect of dried cum causing objects to adhere to each other.
2. The adhesive effect of dried cum causing objects to adhere to each other.
I combed the cum into my hair and it gave my style a light cumhold that lasted all day. It also gave me some faint highlights for which I received compliments.
Cumhold by Velvet Tongue January 4, 2026
Cumpanionship
The feeling of companionship you get from a cum stain left by a sex partner on the bedsheet near your pillow. Without it, you would feel lonely sleeping by yourself.
I enjoy the cumpanionship of the big crusty cum stain left by the hot guy I hooked up with last week. I may not wash my sheets for a while because I don't have a boyfriend and don't want to lose my cumpanion.
Cumpanionship by Velvet Tongue January 3, 2026
Cumpanion
A cum stain left by a sex partner on the bedsheet next to your pillow which, when gazed upon, provides companionship during lonely nights.
When I went to bed and put my head on my pillow I smiled when I saw my cumpanion - a cum stain left on my fitted bedsheet by a guy I hooked up with - and felt for a moment that I wasn't really alone after all. But my smile faded and I soon shed a tear because after I wash my sheets my cumpanion will be gone.
Cumpanion by Velvet Tongue January 3, 2026
Blaymo
A self-driving rideshare vehicle in which a customer receives a blow job from a humanoid robot while en route to their destination. The cost is approximately twice that of a similar ride without the blow job feature.
Bro, I was so horny and couldn't find anyone to hook up with, so I ordered a Blaymo to take me to Chipotle. People in line were like, dude, you look so relaxed, did you just get out of that Blaymo?
Blaymo by Velvet Tongue January 3, 2026
Ejaculation Bowl
A college football bowl game sponsored by condom and sex toy makers as well as by pharmaceutical companies that sell drugs to treat erectile dysfunction.
During the game, players are required to visit Ejaculation Tents along the sidelines in which they are brought to orgasm by various means. The tents are organized by sexual preferences.
The winning team is awarded the coveted Ejaculation Bowl, an engraved, decorative crystal bowl large enough to capture and hold the semen of all players and coaches. Some choose to freeze the team's ejaculate for donation to sperm banks.
During the game, players are required to visit Ejaculation Tents along the sidelines in which they are brought to orgasm by various means. The tents are organized by sexual preferences.
The winning team is awarded the coveted Ejaculation Bowl, an engraved, decorative crystal bowl large enough to capture and hold the semen of all players and coaches. Some choose to freeze the team's ejaculate for donation to sperm banks.
The college football players were disappointed not to have been selected to play in a major bowl game, but were psyched to be going to the Ejaculation Bowl.
One player said, "I hope the volunteers in the Ejaculation Tents are hot." Another said, "I hope we win and get to jack off into the Ejaculation Bowl together. Maybe I'll even get to be a dad." Another said, "I'm not sure I'm going to invite my mom and dad to the game."
One player said, "I hope the volunteers in the Ejaculation Tents are hot." Another said, "I hope we win and get to jack off into the Ejaculation Bowl together. Maybe I'll even get to be a dad." Another said, "I'm not sure I'm going to invite my mom and dad to the game."
Ejaculation Bowl by Velvet Tongue January 2, 2026
BlowMo
A self-driving, ride share vehicle in which the customer receives a blow job from a humanoid robot while en route to their destination. The cost is approximately twice that of a similar vehicle without the robot blow job feature.
Bro, I was so horny and couldn't find anyone to hook up with, so I ordered a BlowMo to take me to Chipotle. People in line were like, dude, you look so relaxed; did you get out of that BlowMo?
BlowMo by Velvet Tongue January 2, 2026
Brarise
To suffer a breakdown and simultaneously arise while collapsing, in a bewildering emotional superposition.
Bro, when I got a text that my girlfriend had been hit by a car and was seriously injured and, at the same time, this other hot chick texted me a naked selfie, I couldn't help but brarise. Brarising confuses the shit out of me.
Brarise by Velvet Tongue January 1, 2026