Definitions by Urban humor

Painting the Porcelain 

When the food you pass explodes in the toilet and there is no white left to be seen

I had Mexican for dinner last night and within 2 hours I was sitting in the bathroom Painting the Porcelain. Why don't they just make toilets in brown?

Painting the Porcelain by Urban humor May 24, 2017

Hurricane Anal

When a hurricane passes by you on the coast, but circles back and comes in the back door.

Bob: Hurricane Matthew is a Cat 4 coming our way!
Tom: I know, but it's coming back for some Hurricane Anal as a 2!

Hurricane Anal by Urban humor October 6, 2016

Heavy Cumer 

Male of the species that when completing sex, cums in such a large volume that there is a measurable weight shift among the two parties (or one party and a sock)

Terri: Was the first time sex with your new boyfriend amazing?
Anne: It was great, but he is such a "Heavy Cumer" that I put on almost two pounds and barely made it to the bathroom!

Heavy Cumer by Urban humor May 25, 2016

Colon Crockpot 

When your large intestine has been holding back waste for more than 48 hours and your farts are the leading indicator of what is to come.

Anne: You haven't pooped in a while Craig, what's going on?
Craig: Everything seems to be cooking in the Colon Crockpot and "dinner" will be served shortly in the spare bathroom!

Colon Crockpot by Urban humor April 1, 2016

jizinal

A device found in upscale restaurants and homes for the purpose of male masturbation and the "catching of the jizz"

We had dinner at a 5 Star steak restaurant and it was so good when I finished I had to use the jizinal to release my pleasure!

jizinal by Urban humor November 8, 2015