The transformation of previously diverse, interesting and cool urban areas into packaged and contrived suburban sameness, one cloned pseudo-trendy chic boutique and café at a time.
Listening to Parker and Logan only poured salt in my wounds at how Banana Republicanization has completely ruined San Francisco.
Parker: Let’s Uber to a café on Valencia Street for an organic-pour-over-single-source-fair-market-turmeric-agave coffee.
Logan: Which fauxhemian café? The one at the corner of 11th? 12th? 13th? 14th? 15th? 16th…?
Parker: That new one, Clones. Besides, I need product for my beard and some vinyl from next door at Posers. You know, the place with the tastefully arranged retro dusty junk from dad’s garage.
Logan: Perfect! Isn’t it great, living in the City? I’m so glad we don’t live in a superficial, contrived place like LA.
Parker: I know, let’s wear our matching custard brown jeans, $300 sneakerboots, and black start-up t-shirts.
Posesterfauxhemianclonepseudohemian clueless
Parker: Let’s Uber to a café on Valencia Street for an organic-pour-over-single-source-fair-market-turmeric-agave coffee.
Logan: Which fauxhemian café? The one at the corner of 11th? 12th? 13th? 14th? 15th? 16th…?
Parker: That new one, Clones. Besides, I need product for my beard and some vinyl from next door at Posers. You know, the place with the tastefully arranged retro dusty junk from dad’s garage.
Logan: Perfect! Isn’t it great, living in the City? I’m so glad we don’t live in a superficial, contrived place like LA.
Parker: I know, let’s wear our matching custard brown jeans, $300 sneakerboots, and black start-up t-shirts.
Posesterfauxhemianclonepseudohemian clueless
by The Original Tankboy October 13, 2017
When spell check changes your word to the wrong word, but the wrong word is actually more appropriate.
I meant to text my friend that she should go to the U2 concert with me because it would be a "great" time. Spell check changed it to "grey" time. That Freudian Spell Check is pretty smart.
by The Original Tankboy August 02, 2017
What too many people do when they online date--complain. And they have no clue that all the other swiper and gripers are saying the same thing about them.
Jennifer--All the guys on this site on such liars and all they want is a hookup. Look at Rick here. That picture is so old. Why do they think I care what car they drive? Hey, what year is that Beemer? Do you think it's leased? Mmmm...looks like he lives on the Bay...
April--Stop your swipin' and gripin'. You been on that UnhingedPlentyofBumLames site for six months. Two boob jobs later and and you're still cashing your ex's checks so now he can't afford his Porsche lease anymore.
Jennifer--Whatever, I'm so over him, he was such a narcissist. Want me to see if Rick has a friend?
April--Sure...
April--Stop your swipin' and gripin'. You been on that UnhingedPlentyofBumLames site for six months. Two boob jobs later and and you're still cashing your ex's checks so now he can't afford his Porsche lease anymore.
Jennifer--Whatever, I'm so over him, he was such a narcissist. Want me to see if Rick has a friend?
April--Sure...
by The Original Tankboy January 01, 2020
The story of how the Capitol insurrectionists' legal teams realized that their best defense was to push Trump under the bus for inciting the insurrectionists to storm the Capitol.
Normal person 1. Hey, did you see how the treasonous insurrectionists are now rightfully blaming Trump for inciting them to be idiots?
Normal person 2. I sure did. It took four years, but we finally have Dante's Revenge.
Normal person 1. It is a fitting and karmic fate for the scum in chief that "...rejected spiritual values by yielding to bestial appetites or violence, or by perverting their human intellect to fraud or malice against their fellowmen."
Normal person 2. I sure did. It took four years, but we finally have Dante's Revenge.
Normal person 1. It is a fitting and karmic fate for the scum in chief that "...rejected spiritual values by yielding to bestial appetites or violence, or by perverting their human intellect to fraud or malice against their fellowmen."
by The Original Tankboy January 22, 2021
Logan: Can’t wait for life to get back to normal.
Parker: That’s not gonna happen. It will be Norma, sorta like normal. We can go shopping or get a drink, but wearing masks and not touching anything, sanitizing everything...
Parker: That’s not gonna happen. It will be Norma, sorta like normal. We can go shopping or get a drink, but wearing masks and not touching anything, sanitizing everything...
by The Original Tankboy May 19, 2020
An overpriced weekend boondoggle at a fancy hotel or spa resort under the guise of promoting mental, physical and spiritual health. All the while, guests stay in very posh rooms and are catered to at all stages. Guests ranges from unfortunate 500 CEO's to yoga mat guy to crypto saleswoman. All will brag to their friends how great a life changing experience it was but they inevitably return to their status quo.
Parker: I feel so great after my wellness retreat at Terranea this weekend. Massages, inspirational sorta TED Talks, farm to table organic whole grain paleo single sourced low glycemic gluten free planet friendly meals…it was amazing. I feel like a new man.
Logan: That's not a wellness retreat. That’s a poshness retreat. And you’ll be right back to pimping big pharma as soon as your Tesla is charged.
Parker: Ya, I guess you’re right. Wish they had just given me the $10,000 in stock options. See you later, gotta go get an office to prescribe more of that new late night advertised wonder drug that is marginally better than the old one but at ten times the price.
Logan: That's not a wellness retreat. That’s a poshness retreat. And you’ll be right back to pimping big pharma as soon as your Tesla is charged.
Parker: Ya, I guess you’re right. Wish they had just given me the $10,000 in stock options. See you later, gotta go get an office to prescribe more of that new late night advertised wonder drug that is marginally better than the old one but at ten times the price.
by The Original Tankboy October 05, 2023
Pronounced POSE-ster. What hipsters really are. Though they put on the airs of being members of the illuminati (see the definition of hipster in Urban Dictionary), they are really just clones, wearing a uniform that is no different that any other, expresses no individuality, and is screaming hypocrisy. They have taken over previously cool neighborhoods like the Mission District in San Francisco. Though their clothing appears from a thrift shop, it is really from a 'vintage' clothing store, at best, or an over-priced chic shop trafficking in poser wear. Though they want to appear free thinking, they gravitate toward sameness. Their obsession with the latest e-gadgetry exemplifies their vacuous nature. Though they claim to be into a simple existence, they have driven up the cost of housing in previously cool urban areas. Though they work in Silicon Valley or similar areas, they 'reverse commute' in plush e-busses FROM the City. They are the same as preppy yuppies from the early 80's, just a different uniform, so their hypocritical nature makes them 'posesters.'
I really miss living in the City. So much to do, nooks and crannies, just a great mix of all kinds of folks.
Ya, me, too. But I had to leave, it has really changed. The posesters have taken over. Even the Mission. It's like Cow Hollow now, just in drab.
No . . . !!!!
Ya, me, too. But I had to leave, it has really changed. The posesters have taken over. Even the Mission. It's like Cow Hollow now, just in drab.
No . . . !!!!
by The Original Tankboy February 14, 2014