Skirtlifter's definitions

cockmuncher

The Office sycophant. A guy - usually in the depths of Hell we call 'Middle Management' - who is always cosying up to the Director, offering platitudes in the hope of imminent promotion.

Did you see how Melvin behaved at the Meeting? WHAT a cockmuncher!

by Skirtlifter January 10, 2005

tattyfilarious

Term oft quoted by Brit comedyman(?) Ken Dodd, but now appropriated to described quality of cocaine.

This stuff's fuckin' tattyfilarious!!!

by skirtlifter January 11, 2005

sponging

Male masturbatory practice.

A spong laden with baby-oil/lotion is placed on a toilet seat; the erection is then place upon said sponge. A second similar sponge is then place atop the erection, and the toilet lid is then pressed down upon the whole caboodle. Thrusting can then commence, applying harder down-pressure as climax approaches.

I'm going home to have a good old sponging tonight!

by Skirtlifter January 10, 2005

houghmagandie

Old Scots term for fornication.

Old wifey overheard in pub: "Ma lumis needin' some serious houghmagandie, ye ken!"

by Skirtlifter January 10, 2005

salami tsunami

Those guys - big dicks or no - who pop their belt and 501 buttons and, hips forward, pop the dicks out en masse at the trough.

I can't piss because of all the salami tsunami next to me are making a racket with their belt buckles and fiddling with their KCs!!!

by Skirtlifter December 28, 2005

old fellae

Scottish slang term for 'Penis'. Derived from 'Old Fellow'.

She whipped oot ma old fellae, and gave me a Jodrell (bank/wank).

by skirtlifter January 10, 2005

lum

19-20th century vernacular for the vagina. A 'lum' was initially a slang word for the flue that drew smoke from an open fire up to the chimney on the rooftop. Lum as a slnag term is quite popular with women of a certain age and social background.

Ah'm goan away tae Benidorm tae get ma auld lum swept by they spanish waiters!!

by Skirtlifter January 10, 2005