Shirty the Slightly Aggressive Bear's definitions

reality

Reality has become a commodity.

When money dictates the content of Wikipedia entries, reality may be defined by the highest bidder.

by Shirty the Slightly Aggressive Bear February 5, 2007

The Colbert Report

A "fake news" television program airing on Comedy Central from Monday to Thursday at 11:30pm eastern time. Hosted by Stephen Colbert, the Report satirizes conservative, ego-centric media pundits such as Bill O'Reilly and Geraldo Rivera.

Pronounced "Col-BEAR Re-PORE".

"Open up baby bird, 'cause mama's got a big fat nightcrawler of truth! This is the Colbert Report!"

by Shirty the Slightly Aggressive Bear January 13, 2007

John Howard

The Prime Minister of Australia between 1996 and 2007. Holds the distinction of being both the second longest-serving PM and the second sitting PM to lose his seat. The worst thing to ever happen to Australia.

You know, you can say what you want about John Howard, but I bet he's sorry now.

by Shirty the Slightly Aggressive Bear March 10, 2008

wikilobbying

The act of paying others money to edit Wikipedia entries in order to cast the employer's company, product or point of view in a better light. Coined by Stephen Colbert of The Colbert Report.

When money determines Wikipedia entries, reality becomes a commodity.

"IBM could throw some of their money at perception and make their product 'objectively better', then Microsoft can just fire their cash cannons back and we're off to the races. This is the essence of wikilobbying." - Stephen Colbert

by Shirty the Slightly Aggressive Bear February 4, 2007

Factiness

Careful, select use of the facts for the achievement of truthiness.

Fact: In 2002, the majority of Democratic senators voted to invade Iraq.
Factiness: They've been in power for two days now - it's their responsibility to get us out.

by Shirty the Slightly Aggressive Bear January 13, 2007

Frnap

"Freedom snap". As coined by Stephen Colbert in The Colbert Report.

"Your country's so ugly, its topographical map wears a paper bag over its head!"
"Ouch - frnap!"

by Shirty the Slightly Aggressive Bear January 13, 2007

Tek Jansen

The Gary-Stu protagonist of Stephen Colbert's (fictional) self-published sci-fi novel, "Stephen Colbert's Alpha Squad 7: Lady Nocturne: A Tek Jansen Adventure".

The "novel" is a dig at right-wing pundit Bill O'Reilly's fiction novel "Those Who Trespass" and at the tendency of television personalities in general to shamelessly promote their products on their own networks.

"Oh, Tek Jansen! You have obviously had hundreds of girlfriends!"

by Shirty the Slightly Aggressive Bear January 13, 2007