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Schnorkenschneider's definitions

Cooperative

A business model where hipster-doofii delude themselves into thinking that the Marxist Utopian fantasies they learned about in college from their hippie professors are capable of overriding economic realities. Since management of Co-Ops is typically run by individuals who are incapable of managing their own lives, they are usually doomed to failure.
Dude, the River Bend Grocery Cooperative is closing down. Aww man, it just opened six months ago.
by Schnorkenschneider March 15, 2014
mugGet the Cooperativemug.

collective

1. A word used to describe the unthinking hive-mind of Leftist drones.

2. A pretentious synonym for club.
1. Drones have been assigned their talking point orders from the Collective today, and will be parroting them throughout the weeks to come.

2. My grandmother belongs to a knitting collective.
by Schnorkenschneider February 22, 2014
mugGet the collectivemug.

Factivist

An adolescent or unthinking adult activist who parrots whatever Organizing For America has ordered them to think, in an effort to spread misinformation and disinformation on behalf of the State.

It generally results in awkward isolation for the factivist, as they proceed to drive their friends and family away from them at parties and holidays.
As a factivist, It's my job to keep reminding my Republican Uncle that if they like their healthcare plan, they can keep their healthcare plan. Period.
by Schnorkenschneider March 15, 2014
mugGet the Factivistmug.

Activist

Fascist nosy busy-body that is more worried about everyone else around them, rather than just focusing on the problems in their own life. Generally tends to delude themselves into thinking they're saving the world.
Jane the activist keeps nagging me to stop buying toilet paper because it will kill too many trees.
by Schnorkenschneider November 21, 2013
mugGet the Activistmug.

hipster

Contrary to popular belief, the hipster ranges in age from teenager all the way up to elderly and everywhere in between. Younger hipsters generally receive their hipster indoctrination from elder burned-out hipsters and hippies who masquerade as qualified teachers and professors.

They can be spotted wearing carefully ill-fitting clothes, about a size too small, in order to project an image of poverty-chic.

Hipsterism requires strict obedience to recycling rituals, and a prohibition of creating new ideas or items. Subsequently, the hipster will generally be seen wearing logos from mid to late 20th Century capitalist brands. They also like to wear fashion-glasses in order to project a false image of intelligence.

They possess a deep misunderstanding of the word ironic, preferring to use the definition from Alanis Morisette's song rather than the dictionary.

Hipsters generate unusual and offensive odors due to their affinity for organic human waste products and a natural aversion to personal hygiene. In the male of the species, you can spot clouds of fleas living in their beards off of uneaten bits of cafe fare. In the female of the species, fleas can be found in their unshaven armpit hair.
I sure wish that hipster would take a bath. Has he been wearing that Atari T-Shirt since 1978?
by Schnorkenschneider April 24, 2014
mugGet the hipstermug.

Positive jamming

An act of online mob mentality whereby a group of fascist activists decide to silence the voices of those with whom they disagree, by aggressively overwhelming a forum with spam, rather than engaging in thoughtful reasoned conversation.
Billy doesn't like what they're saying on that internet forum, so he organized his fellow hactivists to assault their board with positive jamming.
by Schnorkenschneider February 14, 2014
mugGet the Positive jammingmug.

jammers

A romanticized designation given to a person or group of fascists using various electronic or other media to vandalize property or pirate electronic communications to overpower or silence voices that they disagree with.
Billy and his gang of jammers can't stand the opinions being expressed on their local radio station, KLWO. So Billy's jammers are going to take away the station's right to free speech by pirating their own signal to overpower KLWO's signal in an effort to silence them.
by Schnorkenschneider February 22, 2014
mugGet the jammersmug.

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