Sacredfart 's definitions
A typa school where Karen parents send their special little snowflake kids. They think their kids are learning until the kids enter a traditional high school and don’t know basic math.
Teacher: “I can’t keep tutoring this kid after school every week. He has like 9 other tutors but he just doesn’t understand the content. He’s like 3 grade levels behind.”
Parent: “that’s impossible, he went to Montessori. He’s perfect, absolutely my flawless angel, you are a BASTARD for considering such a thing of him being behind. He is only too smart for you peasants.”
Parent: “that’s impossible, he went to Montessori. He’s perfect, absolutely my flawless angel, you are a BASTARD for considering such a thing of him being behind. He is only too smart for you peasants.”
by Sacredfart February 19, 2023
Get the Montessori mug.Theater kids but with more drugs. They’re easily spotted using the following criteria:
- they often suffer from main character syndrome
- they are well over the age of 18
- They’re that one group of loud white people at every bar
- They’re very passionate about issues
- they often suffer from main character syndrome
- they are well over the age of 18
- They’re that one group of loud white people at every bar
- They’re very passionate about issues
Person: “thank you for picking me up very quickly, I just needed to get outta that situation.”
Uber: “you’re welcome. Was it a dangerous situation? Do I need to report anything?”
Person: “no, there was just a lot of theater adults there and they sucked the energy outta my mind and body.”
Uber: “oh no I’m so sorry.”
Uber: “you’re welcome. Was it a dangerous situation? Do I need to report anything?”
Person: “no, there was just a lot of theater adults there and they sucked the energy outta my mind and body.”
Uber: “oh no I’m so sorry.”
by Sacredfart February 19, 2023
Get the Theater adults mug.Also known as MPD. This is a disorder occurring in children or adolescents that transition from a Montessori school to a traditional school. There are 2 types.
Symptoms:
- lack of understanding social cues
- lack of math skills
- lack of general content knowledge (ie history, science)
- difficulty making friends
- trauma
- Type 1 specific symptoms: aggressive and or violent patterns of behavior, anger issues, overly literal thinking
- Type 2 specific symptoms: social withdrawal, social anxiety, overly abstract thinking
Treatment: rehab
Outlook: patients usually make a full recovery within 3-6 years if they have proper interventions.
Symptoms:
- lack of understanding social cues
- lack of math skills
- lack of general content knowledge (ie history, science)
- difficulty making friends
- trauma
- Type 1 specific symptoms: aggressive and or violent patterns of behavior, anger issues, overly literal thinking
- Type 2 specific symptoms: social withdrawal, social anxiety, overly abstract thinking
Treatment: rehab
Outlook: patients usually make a full recovery within 3-6 years if they have proper interventions.
Psychologist: “I’m so sorry I have to have this conversation today, I always hate telling such devastating news to parents.”
Parent: “does my kid have brain AIDS?”
Psychologist: “worse, your son suffers from Montessori Personality Disorder, my condolences.”
Parent: “does my kid have brain AIDS?”
Psychologist: “worse, your son suffers from Montessori Personality Disorder, my condolences.”
by Sacredfart February 19, 2023
Get the Montessori Personality Disorder mug.by Sacredfart December 18, 2022
Get the Coded mug.A term used in the very niche community of medical malpractice victims. It stands for “providence trauma and stress disorder” because providence is a major healthcare network known for malpractice.
Me: *working at a non Providence hospital blocks away from a providence one.*
Me: “So what’s your opinion on providence, they overdosed me once cause they dosed my meds in the wrong unit of measurement, then called the cops on me when I threatened to sue and tried to frame me for first degree assault.”
Patient: “funny little story you got there, they amputated the wrong fucking leg.”
Patient 2: “yeah but did they kill your daughter? No? Stfu with your pussy stories.”
Patient 3: “hate to eavesdrop but the only reason I came here was cause providence gave me the wrong blood type after my accident, it’s actually a miracle I’m alive because they laughed at me.”
Patient 4: “okay okay but are you guys the ones with brain cancer? No, they kept saying my MRIs were normal then laughed like 4 weeks later and were like “haha it’s a prank.”
Me: “damn, PTSD 2.0 victims need a fucking support group.”
Me: “So what’s your opinion on providence, they overdosed me once cause they dosed my meds in the wrong unit of measurement, then called the cops on me when I threatened to sue and tried to frame me for first degree assault.”
Patient: “funny little story you got there, they amputated the wrong fucking leg.”
Patient 2: “yeah but did they kill your daughter? No? Stfu with your pussy stories.”
Patient 3: “hate to eavesdrop but the only reason I came here was cause providence gave me the wrong blood type after my accident, it’s actually a miracle I’m alive because they laughed at me.”
Patient 4: “okay okay but are you guys the ones with brain cancer? No, they kept saying my MRIs were normal then laughed like 4 weeks later and were like “haha it’s a prank.”
Me: “damn, PTSD 2.0 victims need a fucking support group.”
by Sacredfart April 4, 2023
Get the PTSD 2.0 mug.Me: *doing some shit I’m not supposed to be doing.*
Me: *stops suddenly.*
Friend: “are you okay?”
Me: “yeah there’s a narc behind me.”
Friend: “oh you mean-“
Me: “shut the fuuuuuuck shhhhh don’t say her name, don’t make eye contact, if you say it three times in the mirror she’ll appear in your dreams and make you complete your competency checklist.”
Friend: “stop being ridiculous, she’s no narc.”
She: *walks over the admin.*
Admin: “so you’ve been watching him (friend), you have any more reports?”
She: “yeah it showed on that camera I put in his window that he was watching an R rated movie with his 16 year old brother. You have to be 17 to do that.”
Friend: “WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!”
Me: “whatever I’m going home.”
Friend: “what’s wrong with you? Back me up!”
Me: “no way, you’re own fault that you didn’t listen to my narcdar.
Me: *stops suddenly.*
Friend: “are you okay?”
Me: “yeah there’s a narc behind me.”
Friend: “oh you mean-“
Me: “shut the fuuuuuuck shhhhh don’t say her name, don’t make eye contact, if you say it three times in the mirror she’ll appear in your dreams and make you complete your competency checklist.”
Friend: “stop being ridiculous, she’s no narc.”
She: *walks over the admin.*
Admin: “so you’ve been watching him (friend), you have any more reports?”
She: “yeah it showed on that camera I put in his window that he was watching an R rated movie with his 16 year old brother. You have to be 17 to do that.”
Friend: “WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!”
Me: “whatever I’m going home.”
Friend: “what’s wrong with you? Back me up!”
Me: “no way, you’re own fault that you didn’t listen to my narcdar.
by Sacredfart April 4, 2023
Get the Narcdar mug.This thing that hospital admin makes people do sometimes where we “need” to take valuable time out of our work day to narc on people not washing their hands efficiently.
Me writing one if I actually filled them out: “so I stalkerishly followed a nurse into the bathroom and while I was pretending to take a piss I was actually singing happy birthday in my head to see how long she washed her hands for. And I got to that 🎶🎶 “happy birthday dear fuck you” 🎶🎶🎶 but I didn’t quite get to that last “happy birthday to you” verse.
Signed, my hand hygiene audits of April 4th 2023
Signed, my hand hygiene audits of April 4th 2023
by Sacredfart April 4, 2023
Get the Hand hygiene audits mug.