Definitions by Robert Head
Throb-job
A lady, who to put it mildly, has a vagina that bares the signs and scars of much over-use in its time.
Person 1: So, did you fuck the shit out of that girl you keep chatting about.
Person 2: Look I'd rather leave this stone unturned, get my message.
Person 1: What, don't put that evil on me. Give me a straight answer, what's the problem.
Person 2: Well, she... she was a fucking throb-job you hear, her vagina looked like a fucking cement mixer ok, I'd need a fucking tree trunk just to hit the spot in that thing.
Person 1: Whoa man... you mean to tell me, that you... you never took your chances, she's like the hottest girl around the whole state.
Person 2: Well you try fucking her when you're presenting a fucking mountain with a bonsai tree, look it's her fault... I'm built just fine, so wipe that fucking smirk off your face.
Person 2: Look I'd rather leave this stone unturned, get my message.
Person 1: What, don't put that evil on me. Give me a straight answer, what's the problem.
Person 2: Well, she... she was a fucking throb-job you hear, her vagina looked like a fucking cement mixer ok, I'd need a fucking tree trunk just to hit the spot in that thing.
Person 1: Whoa man... you mean to tell me, that you... you never took your chances, she's like the hottest girl around the whole state.
Person 2: Well you try fucking her when you're presenting a fucking mountain with a bonsai tree, look it's her fault... I'm built just fine, so wipe that fucking smirk off your face.
Throb-job by Robert Head December 24, 2008
Go deep!
To "go deep" can lean on two senses of the word in my eyes: either a) to go deeper down the field when playing American football - don't ask me, not American or b) to penetrate your lady (or man friend) that slight bit deeper by changing angle or adding a slight bit of thrust... kabang and there you have it.
1 - "Mikey, go deep I'm gonna make this mother fucker fly like that frantic greek child who flew to close to the sun".
2 - ...later that night at either (a) Mikey's mum's, (b) Mikey's coache's or (c) Mikey's girlfriend's place, whatever floats your boat - "Ohh Mikey, way to go. Ohh, phud... ohh slam me hunny. Drill me like Dr. Evil's project vulcan baby, drill me good like the driller killer, ohh fuck me... fuck me, go deep! Take me to the core of the earth baby....woooohoooo. What a fucking rush - p.s. she faked it.
2 - ...later that night at either (a) Mikey's mum's, (b) Mikey's coache's or (c) Mikey's girlfriend's place, whatever floats your boat - "Ohh Mikey, way to go. Ohh, phud... ohh slam me hunny. Drill me like Dr. Evil's project vulcan baby, drill me good like the driller killer, ohh fuck me... fuck me, go deep! Take me to the core of the earth baby....woooohoooo. What a fucking rush - p.s. she faked it.
Go deep! by Robert Head December 24, 2008
Hench
Derived from Henchman i.e. think of The Kingpin from the Marvel comic series, the fat headed white breed or rare bear may be considered "hench" per se, because apparently, as he says and I quote "over 90% of my body is comprised of pure muscle mwuahahahahah". And yeah that's the only vice the guy has, that he's a giant fat head with a freakish amount of muscle hanging off of his bones. A hench someone is someone considered very large and extremely dangerous i.e. Mongo from Blazing Saddles, Goldberger from Stir Crazy or any bouncer you'll see at a respectable club, though most of the guys are over-reactive idiots, nay isotopes of idiots - a rare fucking breed.
Oh check out Bazza the doorman, isn't he a hench one. Boys, I bet that with four of us we can chav tag-team this big ugly fucker and then happy slap him on our phones which we can never tell apart because we're not sure which are coming or going, but I have an incling that the guy will show me the lining of my rib cage before I'll ever take him down so maybe I'll just wait until the guy gets a dodgey knee or something.
Hench by Robert Head December 24, 2008
Chav tag-team
When a whord of those little urban urchins we otherwise know as chavs, attack pedestrians in insanely large and hooliganish numbers in order to prove a point that they're "hard mate, don't mug or murk me off blud as I'll knock you spark out" or to just steal a worthwhile valuable item, which may often to them be something that you hadn't had the time to assign any value like a 1 penny coin or a fake pearl bracelet or possibly just possibly a very old, extremely crap, rusty bicycle which lacks brake power, a second wheel and a few spokes - yeah they really will take anything they can and then whorde it in their garbage lined dens.
Oh sorry we're late, we got chav tag-teamed on the way here, so Rich had to kick one of them in the teeth and Sarah let them have it with some cheap hairspray she had lying in the recesses of her handbag.
Chav tag-team by Robert Head December 24, 2008
Tedious tonguing
When you flicker your tongue in a menial way over a static area of the vagina, and induldge in the almost eternally fantastic time you're having whilst your chick is lying down proned with at least one raised eyebrow:
as she thinks "ok, I thought he'd be more adventurous than this - maybe the dog snuck in here - ohh god no, wrong, wrong JEV? "Yes hunny?". "Oh, it is you, listen would you consider keeping my vagina awake for me because this tedious tonguing you're applying to my female crotch is going to send me into one of my long slumbers at any minute". "Ok hunny I'll do as you told me, dip, swirl, pull, flick, dip, swirl...". "JEV... I think you may be hopeless...".
Tedious tonguing by Robert Head December 24, 2008
Rasputin
Not to be confused with creamed rice or as we Brits call it, rice pudding.
"Gregory Yefimovich Rasputin, the son of a Russian peasant, was born in Pokrovskoye, Siberia, in 1872. Although he briefly attended school he failed to learn how to read or write.
Rasputin entered the Verkhoture Monastery but decided against becoming a monk. He returned to Pokrovskoye and at the age of 19 married Proskovia Fyodorovna. Over the next few years the couple had four children.
Rasputin eventually left home and traveled to Greece and the Middle East. He claimed he had special powers that enabled him to heal the sick and lived off the donations of people he helped. Rasputin also made money as a fortune teller.
Soon after arriving in St. Petersburg in 1903, Rasputin met Hermogen, the Bishop of Saratov. He was impressed by Rasputin's healing powers and introduced him to Nicholas II and his wife, Alexandra Fedorovna. The Tsar's only son, Alexis, suffered from hemophilia (a disease whereby the blood does not clot if a wound occurs). When Alexis was taken seriously ill in 1908, Rasputin was called to the royal palace. He managed to stop the bleeding and from then on he became a member of the royal entourage.
In September, 1915, Nicholas II assumed supreme command of the Russian Army fighting on the Eastern Front. As he spent most of his time at GHQ, Alexandra Fedorovna now took responsibility for domestic policy. Rasputin served as her adviser and over the next few months she dismissed ministers and their deputies in rapid succession.
Rumours began to circulate that Rasputin and Alexandra Fedorovna were leaders of a pro-German court group and were seeking a separate peace with the Central Powers in order to help the survival of the autocracy in Russia.
Rasputin was also suspected of financial corruption and right-wing politicians believed that he was undermining the popularity of the regime. Felix Yusupov, the husband of the Tsar's niece, Vladimir Purishkevich, the leader of the monarchists in the Duma, and Grand Duke Dmitri, formed a conspiracy to murder Rasputin. On 29th December, 1916, Rasputin was invited to Yusupov's home where he was given poisoned wine and cakes. When this did not kill him he was shot by Yusupov and Purishkevich and then dropped through a hole in the frozen canal outside the house."
RASPUTIN may also refer to the abbreviation: Red-raw Arsehole Succumbing to Penetration Under the Tiring Interception of Nozzles.
"Gregory Yefimovich Rasputin, the son of a Russian peasant, was born in Pokrovskoye, Siberia, in 1872. Although he briefly attended school he failed to learn how to read or write.
Rasputin entered the Verkhoture Monastery but decided against becoming a monk. He returned to Pokrovskoye and at the age of 19 married Proskovia Fyodorovna. Over the next few years the couple had four children.
Rasputin eventually left home and traveled to Greece and the Middle East. He claimed he had special powers that enabled him to heal the sick and lived off the donations of people he helped. Rasputin also made money as a fortune teller.
Soon after arriving in St. Petersburg in 1903, Rasputin met Hermogen, the Bishop of Saratov. He was impressed by Rasputin's healing powers and introduced him to Nicholas II and his wife, Alexandra Fedorovna. The Tsar's only son, Alexis, suffered from hemophilia (a disease whereby the blood does not clot if a wound occurs). When Alexis was taken seriously ill in 1908, Rasputin was called to the royal palace. He managed to stop the bleeding and from then on he became a member of the royal entourage.
In September, 1915, Nicholas II assumed supreme command of the Russian Army fighting on the Eastern Front. As he spent most of his time at GHQ, Alexandra Fedorovna now took responsibility for domestic policy. Rasputin served as her adviser and over the next few months she dismissed ministers and their deputies in rapid succession.
Rumours began to circulate that Rasputin and Alexandra Fedorovna were leaders of a pro-German court group and were seeking a separate peace with the Central Powers in order to help the survival of the autocracy in Russia.
Rasputin was also suspected of financial corruption and right-wing politicians believed that he was undermining the popularity of the regime. Felix Yusupov, the husband of the Tsar's niece, Vladimir Purishkevich, the leader of the monarchists in the Duma, and Grand Duke Dmitri, formed a conspiracy to murder Rasputin. On 29th December, 1916, Rasputin was invited to Yusupov's home where he was given poisoned wine and cakes. When this did not kill him he was shot by Yusupov and Purishkevich and then dropped through a hole in the frozen canal outside the house."
RASPUTIN may also refer to the abbreviation: Red-raw Arsehole Succumbing to Penetration Under the Tiring Interception of Nozzles.
1st Guy: Argh man She's jail-abit, why didn't she throw you off.
2nd Guy: Well I gave her arse-hole a good seeing to RASPUTIN style.
2nd Guy: Well I gave her arse-hole a good seeing to RASPUTIN style.
Rasputin by Robert Head December 24, 2008
Triangle material
A person or thing that is so downright stupid and incompetent that say in the context of starting a band would be placed on either a gong or most likely a triangle; as can be seen in Blackadder goes Forth, during the intro Baldrick chimes a triangle with all the look of a genial miracle worker on his face.
Call her Mindy: So, are you asking Rick to the prom
Call her Samantha: Minds, please. Sure he's hot but the conversation would sink to a dry desert swell within seconds.
Mindy: But the body, oh the body...
Samantha:... and what about it, bitch get in pecking order. You shadow me, got it? Besides, I may even choose this triangle material as my choice before the night is through yet, let's just see.
Mindy: Sure Sam, sure... gee do you think he's got a purdy lookin' packet of meat -
Samantha: - minds, this is the 80s, as if. Can you imagine a guy even offering me that kind of thing, even if he is a baboon who does nothing but jack off in front of the mirror all day... yeah he tells me these things, he finds them quite intriguing. You know what, you take him... when you put two dummys together you're sure to end up with two very quiet mouths, and I'd pay hard coinage - cash Minds - to have you two shut up for just a nanosecond.
Call her Samantha: Minds, please. Sure he's hot but the conversation would sink to a dry desert swell within seconds.
Mindy: But the body, oh the body...
Samantha:... and what about it, bitch get in pecking order. You shadow me, got it? Besides, I may even choose this triangle material as my choice before the night is through yet, let's just see.
Mindy: Sure Sam, sure... gee do you think he's got a purdy lookin' packet of meat -
Samantha: - minds, this is the 80s, as if. Can you imagine a guy even offering me that kind of thing, even if he is a baboon who does nothing but jack off in front of the mirror all day... yeah he tells me these things, he finds them quite intriguing. You know what, you take him... when you put two dummys together you're sure to end up with two very quiet mouths, and I'd pay hard coinage - cash Minds - to have you two shut up for just a nanosecond.
Triangle material by Robert Head December 9, 2008