Definitions by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin

wisconsin pretty 

A term used to describe an American woman who in most other states would be considered unattractive, but is beautiful by the standards of men from Wisconsin.

Guy: "what do you think of that chick over there by the keg?"
Friend: "you mean the one with the gut and John Denver haircut?"
Guy: "yeah, that one."
Friend: "Well she looks like Rebel Wilson, so I guess she's Wisconsin Pretty."
Guy: "Go Packers..."

wisconsin pretty by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin March 1, 2018

cocoa snake

Any turd that is at least 8 inches in length.

This morning I woke up and took a shit, dropped a massive cocoa snake in the bowl.

cocoa snake by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin January 31, 2018

queef stroganoff 

The thick, noxious sludge that drips from a fat woman's cooter when she gets super horned up during the summer months, and her vaginal secretions meet the rest of her panty sweat.

Oh my god, my mom went for a walk today and when she came home, the entire house stunk like Queef Stroganoff.

queef stroganoff by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin July 19, 2016