hockey mom

Sarah Palin’s folksy, self-proclaimed description of herself, followed by her assertion that the only difference between a hockey mom and a pitbull is lipstick – therefore publicly admitting that she walks on four legs, has eight nipples, a tail and greets her friends by sniffing their assholes. (And within the Tea Party, that’s a whole lot of sniffing!)

Man 1: Let’s put some lipstick on that pitbull and turn it into a hockey mom.
Man 2: Better yet, let’s put some lipstick and glasses on it and turn it into Sarah Palin!

by Politic Ric October 22, 2010

cash rash

A severe allergic reaction, usually found on the upper thighs or ass cheeks, brought about by any amount of money ‘burning a hole in your pocket.’ The only known cure is to spend every cent of your Welfare check, Social Security check or Paycheck before midnight on payday – no matter what your financial obligations might be. Purchases generally include such low-rent essentials as cigarettes, lottery tickets, liquor, drugs, new release DVDs or CDs. Expenses such as rent, car payments, insurance, clothing or food are not considered to be essentials and therefore are not factored into the equation.

“Ouch! I gotta buy some cigarettes, DVDs and lottery tickets, quick - before I get a cash rash! I had a lot of overtime this week!”

by Politic Ric May 26, 2010

Michael Steele Minute

A Michael Steele Minute is destined to replace the New York Minute as the smallest measurable amount of time in the universe.

A New York Minute is defined as the time between a traffic light turning green in New York City and the cab driver behind you honking his horn.

A Michael Steele Minute is defined as the time between President Obama leaving the Executive Office of the President of the United States and the firing of Michael Steele as the Chairman of the Republican National Committee.

Man 1: If I were offered that job, I’d have said yes in a Michael Steele Minute!

Man 2: You and me both!

by Politic Ric November 10, 2010

Game over, you win!

Whenever you find yourself in a situation that feels like it may escalate from a simple misunderstanding or disagreement into something worse – and you’re really not in the mood, just remember these four little words. This just might be the simplest phrase ever conceived to stop a potential argument dead in its tracks.

M: You’re going to go past it! I said it was on the right!
R: No, you said it was on the left.
M: No, I distinctly told you that it was on the…
R: Game over, you win!

by Politic Ric October 27, 2010

white trash

If you're constantly being bothered or annoyed by a 'white trash' acquaintance, neighbor or relative, and want to get rid of them once and for all - just lend them $20.00.
You'll never see them again.

That $20.00 I loaned to that white trash, low-life Bubba was the best money I ever spent!

by Politic Ric March 06, 2007

Nilap Haras

A dozen-word compilation describing a person who exhibits only positive traits. He or she is sincere, intelligent, competent, respectful, tolerant, unbiased, empathetic, genuine, delightful, loving, sophisticated and trustworthy.

When the letters that spell Nilap Haras are reversed, it reveals a person exhibiting the exact opposite characteristics, and is sarcastic, ignorant, incompetent, disrespectful, narrow-minded, bigoted, unfeeling, deceptive, obnoxious, hateful, backwoods and corrupt.

Man 1: I wish I could find a woman who is Nilap Haras!
Man 2: Doesn’t everyone?

by Politic Ric November 02, 2010

Roll Reversal

The act of flipping a roll of toilet paper around on its holder, so the paper comes off from the back of the roll, instead of the front.

“Man, I spun that roll a dozen times before I realized you had done a roll reversal on me!”

by Politic Ric April 28, 2012