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Politic Ric's definitions

Just Just

Barely Legal. Taken from two definitions of the word Just.

Definition 1: Barely; by a narrow margin; within a brief period of time; only; merely

Definition 2: Legal; legitimate; guided by justice; in accordance with standards; right; lawful; proper
Man 1: “You’d better stay away from her, or you’ll end up in jail!”
Man 2: “No worries, I checked her out. She’s Just Just!”
by Politic Ric June 2, 2010
mugGet the Just Justmug.

The Spread Eagle Has Landed

When your sleazy, white trash, welfare-dependant daughter comes back to roost at your home with her five illegitimate children – because she just can’t make ends meet on four handouts alone.

With the cost of everything rising, public assistance from Welfare, Social Security, Food Stamps and Child Support is no longer allowing her to live the way that she had been accustomed – and the single-wide trailer has just been repossessed!

It’s sad, but once the essentials such as cigarettes, beer, drugs, snacks, lottery tickets, magazines and pre-paid cell phone cards are purchased, there never seems to be enough money left over for the non-essentials such as rent, utilities, gas or car repairs.
Man1: I heard that C moved back in with you, with all the kids.

Man 2: Yep, The Spread Eagle Has Landed!
by Politic Ric October 31, 2010
mugGet the The Spread Eagle Has Landedmug.

hockey mom

Sarah Palin’s folksy, self-proclaimed description of herself, followed by her assertion that the only difference between a hockey mom and a pitbull is lipstick – therefore publicly admitting that she walks on four legs, has eight nipples, a tail and greets her friends by sniffing their assholes. (And within the Tea Party, that’s a whole lot of sniffing!)
Man 1: Let’s put some lipstick on that pitbull and turn it into a hockey mom.
Man 2: Better yet, let’s put some lipstick and glasses on it and turn it into Sarah Palin!
by Politic Ric October 22, 2010
mugGet the hockey mommug.

cash rash

A severe allergic reaction, usually found on the upper thighs or ass cheeks, brought about by any amount of money ‘burning a hole in your pocket.’ The only known cure is to spend every cent of your Welfare check, Social Security check or Paycheck before midnight on payday – no matter what your financial obligations might be. Purchases generally include such low-rent essentials as cigarettes, lottery tickets, liquor, drugs, new release DVDs or CDs. Expenses such as rent, car payments, insurance, clothing or food are not considered to be essentials and therefore are not factored into the equation.
“Ouch! I gotta buy some cigarettes, DVDs and lottery tickets, quick - before I get a cash rash! I had a lot of overtime this week!”
by Politic Ric May 26, 2010
mugGet the cash rashmug.

Trojan Whores

Beautiful, voluptuous women that you find impossible to resist… but… they have a ‘look’ that says they’ve ‘been around the block’ a few too many times. Although having sex with them is very tempting, your inner voice keeps warning you that something evil lurks inside, and you’ll probably end up contracting AIDS or some other serious STD if you’re not very careful – so you’d better double up on the condoms.
Man 1: “See ya tomorrow morning. I just got an offer I can’t refuse from those two babes!”
Man 2: “Make sure you wear a condom on your condom. They look like a couple Trojan Whores to me!”
by Politic Ric May 27, 2010
mugGet the Trojan Whoresmug.

Teatard

A person who believes one or more of the Tea Party’s slant on today’s political issues. Many of their rants are so bizarre and without basis that they weren’t taken seriously until the movement had grown to an alarming collection of right-wing extremists, thus proving that the number of insane people currently residing in the US was grossly underestimated. Some of their more bigoted, racist, religious or homophobic beliefs include:
 Obama is a Muslim Socialist and is not eligible to be president because he was born in Kenya.
 Obama is going to take away their guns.
 If Republicans gain control of the House, Obama should be impeached.
 Repeal the 14th Amendment so being born in America won’t mean automatic citizenship.
 Obama’s Healthcare Plan has a hidden ‘Death Panel’ clause so they can decide who lives or dies.
 16,000 IRS agents have been hired to jail people who don’t have health insurance.
 Abortion is Murder. Every unborn child has the right to be born and survive to the age of eighteen so he or she can join the military and kill other eighteen year olds that have different religious or political views than they do.
 Church and State should be one.
 Gay marriage will ruin the sanctity of marriage.
 Evolution is a hoax.
 Creationism should be taught in schools.
Global warming is a hoax.
 The Earth was created in 6 days and is 6,000 years old.
 Sarah Palin could become one of America’s finest presidents.
Man 1: I can’t believe that guy. He thinks Sarah Palin would make a great president!
Man 2: President of what?
Man 1: The United States!
Man 2: What? No way! He’s such a Teatard!
by Politic Ric October 27, 2010
mugGet the Teatardmug.

eleash

An “electronic leash” such as a cell phone, smartphone, PDA or any other electronic device that allows a possessive, controlling, paranoid, psycho, schizo or bipolar ‘significant other’ to keep in constant contact with their partner, throughout the day, for the sole purpose of harassment or controlling their every move.
R: “I can’t believe that he keeps his eleash turned on. She calls him every minute of the day, just to piss him off!”
J: “He should turn it off and just deal with her when he gets home.”
R: “I guess he’s afraid if he does, she’ll trash all of his stuff, or dump it at the curb. She’s done it before!”
by Politic Ric May 19, 2010
mugGet the eleashmug.

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