19 definitions by Peter Adams
So I only realised that she was a man after we had done the dirty.
by Peter Adams January 6, 2004
A ginger tabby alley-cat covered in curry and stuff. He is infested inside and out with every disease known to man. He meows like a bitch and growls at anything that moves. His tail always sticks up 90 degrees and shit flakes fly out his arse when he farts. His claws are like 9 inches long and make a bastard of a noise on hard ground.
He climbs in through the window when you're out, finds the whitest carpet/piece of furniture and wipes his arse all over it, leaving lovely brown streaks everywhere. On his way out he steals some food.
He climbs in through the window when you're out, finds the whitest carpet/piece of furniture and wipes his arse all over it, leaving lovely brown streaks everywhere. On his way out he steals some food.
"Keep your doors and windows locked, for Skimbleshanks is on the loose! He will turdify any white furniture or carpet in your house!"
by Peter Adams January 7, 2004
The stream of piss aimed at a shlump trying to blast it into the toilet water. Every guy does it! It makes going to the toilet more fun!
by Peter Adams January 7, 2004
These strange species can seem perfectly harmless until they are placed in their natural habitat. If there is a silverbacked charva who is superior to everyone as he has the latest Scooter album, the other charvas will form a protective ring around him.
These scourge plague the streets of most cities, but most of all Newcastle. The male of the species will have short spiked hair, and will pretend their voice is deep years before it has broken, which appears to be an effective mating call. The female of the species will wear truckloads of makeup and huge (often plastic) earrings the size of the millennium wheel. If temperatures are below -5 degrees C, they will feel inclined to wear a mini skirt which barely covers their hips (see also: Micro Skirt)
When the male and female of the species meet, the male will put on a burbry cap to seem more attractive. Within an hour the two will have engaged in unprotected sex and whoops!...there goes another teenage pregnancy, another scum bag to pay for in our taxes!
Charvas will also force themselves to start smoking at the age of about 12, which is a sign that they are "Hard" or "Belter".
Any human verbal interaction with these vermin will result in an absolutely moronic response such as "Hew man you fucking daft cunt!" when asked to rephrase their inadequately worded statement, the same, only slightly more angry response is thrown at you.
No other 'race' other than their own is acceptable. Any goths, punks, skaters or grungies are renamed to "tree huggers" or "hippys". They do not have the brain cells to understand that they are infact the worst scourge of this planet!
Lastly, they will start fights with anybody that's smaller than them, to try and make themselves feel highly superior, and to try and impress the opposite sex. The long long list could go on forever.
To sum it up, these spangle stained hooligans are a dire example of Darwin's "Survival of the fittest" and are a complete waste of space, carbon lifeform, and tax payers money!
These scourge plague the streets of most cities, but most of all Newcastle. The male of the species will have short spiked hair, and will pretend their voice is deep years before it has broken, which appears to be an effective mating call. The female of the species will wear truckloads of makeup and huge (often plastic) earrings the size of the millennium wheel. If temperatures are below -5 degrees C, they will feel inclined to wear a mini skirt which barely covers their hips (see also: Micro Skirt)
When the male and female of the species meet, the male will put on a burbry cap to seem more attractive. Within an hour the two will have engaged in unprotected sex and whoops!...there goes another teenage pregnancy, another scum bag to pay for in our taxes!
Charvas will also force themselves to start smoking at the age of about 12, which is a sign that they are "Hard" or "Belter".
Any human verbal interaction with these vermin will result in an absolutely moronic response such as "Hew man you fucking daft cunt!" when asked to rephrase their inadequately worded statement, the same, only slightly more angry response is thrown at you.
No other 'race' other than their own is acceptable. Any goths, punks, skaters or grungies are renamed to "tree huggers" or "hippys". They do not have the brain cells to understand that they are infact the worst scourge of this planet!
Lastly, they will start fights with anybody that's smaller than them, to try and make themselves feel highly superior, and to try and impress the opposite sex. The long long list could go on forever.
To sum it up, these spangle stained hooligans are a dire example of Darwin's "Survival of the fittest" and are a complete waste of space, carbon lifeform, and tax payers money!
by Peter Adams January 6, 2004
by Peter Adams January 6, 2004