Olof Carmody's definitions

smell phone

1. a cell phone that you accidentally drop in the toilet. Occasionally the phone will still be functional after it's dried off or taken in to get repaired and the owner will say "fuck it" and continue to use it even though it's been in a smelly toilet. How do we know if the phone has been in a toilet? Your Facebook status states: Drunkidiot dropped her phone in the toilet :(
2. a cell phone that smells like shit for some other reason

- Yo dude I dropped my phone in the toilet and it still works!!! Use it to call your parents to tell them you're gay!
- Fuck you assfuck and get that smell phone away from me


- Why does my phone smell like shit?
- I don't know but shove that smell phone up your ass where it belongs

by Olof Carmody March 11, 2009

right-of-stay

when two cars disregard the right-of-way guidelines they were supposed learn from a driver's manual when they were 16, resulting in both cars to remain motionless at an intersection assuming the other car will make the first move. Usually after about 1o seconds both cars will go at the same time which leads to a firestorm of profanity and/or an accident.

Right-of-stay
At a four-way stop sign intersection

Northbound Car: Is this person gonna go or what

Westbound Car: Is this person gonna go or what

Northbound Car: Fuckin' go dude

Westbound Car: Fuckin' go dude

Northbound Car: Fuck this guy I'm going

Westbound Car: Fuck this guy I'm going

Northbound Car: What the fuck is wrong with you motherfucker

Westbound Car: Fuck you and your gay ass PT Cruiser asshole

by Olof Carmody June 12, 2008

brofix

Prefixing a word with "bro". Common usages: bromance, broasis, brofessional, brocialize, broseph, brobot, broller coaster, brotato chip, etc

-Is Edgar Allen Bro a brofix?
-No but Brover Cleveland is

by Olof Carmody June 10, 2008

goldtop

a can of cheap and delicious Busch beer

Stupid Person: Yo dude pass me a Busch

Smart Person: Yeah but it's called a goldtop

Stupid Person: Goldtop?

Smart Person: Just look at the color of the top of the can

Stupid Person: Oh I get it. I'm sorry for not calling it by its proper name. So let me get a goldtop bro

Smart Person: No, get your own shithead

by Olof Carmody June 9, 2008

busfucked

to get stuck behind a school bus that's making way too many stops usually when you're already running late to work or to catch a train

I'm sorry I'm late boss but I got busfucked an unprecedented 3 different times on the way to work.

Dude, we've been busfucked for over 20 minutes. I'm thinking about running over the next fucking kid that gets on that damn bus. I'm sure the judge will understand.

Bro I got busfucked and missed my train so I'm gonna chill and drink some gold tops in my car till the next one comes.

by Olof Carmody February 25, 2008

black in

to piece together parts of a night that was initially categorized as a blackout. Usually followed by an epiphany

I remember being really hungry, really tired and really cold last night. But that doesn't explain why I'm now well fed, well rested and smell like shit. Wait a second! I'm starting to black in now. I was stumbling home and decided to fulfill all 3 needs in one shot so I hopped in a dumpster, covered myself in newspaper and ate a bunch of dumpster food.
I'm not an alcoholic because I didn't blackout, but I might actually be a bum

by Olof Carmody February 25, 2008

Silentology

the study of shutting the fuck up about scientology

Hey Tom Cruise, stop preaching about your bullshit "religion" and start practicing some silentology you little fucking weirdo

by Olof Carmody January 28, 2008