Nicholas D's definitions
A phrase that means that something is so good that you're awestruck by it to the point where you're so disoriented that you might mistakenly slap your grandmother. If someone takes this literally it could at best cause an awkward situation and at worst cause your entire family to fall apart.
"Woo-wee, shut my mouth, slap your grandma!
There oughta be a law, get the sheriff on the phone
Lord have mercy, how'd she even get them britches on
That honky tonk badonkadonk..."
-Trace Adkins, "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk"
Mom: "Everybody, Jimmy was nice enough to cook us this Thanksgiving turkey!"
Everyone: "Yea, Jimmy! Hip hip hooray!"
Jimmy: "Aw gee guys...Mom, why don't you have the first bite."
Mom: (eating it) "WOW I'll be damned if this isn't the greatest turkey I've ever had! Slap your grandma!"
Jimmy: "OK." ***SMACK!!!*** (pimp-slaps her across the face)
Mom: "Well I never! Jimmy, how could you?"
Dad: "Son, get out of here this instant. You're banished from this family forever."
Jimmy: "But but but..."
Dad: "But but but...SHUT UP!!! Get your elderly-assaulting ass out of my house!"
There oughta be a law, get the sheriff on the phone
Lord have mercy, how'd she even get them britches on
That honky tonk badonkadonk..."
-Trace Adkins, "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk"
Mom: "Everybody, Jimmy was nice enough to cook us this Thanksgiving turkey!"
Everyone: "Yea, Jimmy! Hip hip hooray!"
Jimmy: "Aw gee guys...Mom, why don't you have the first bite."
Mom: (eating it) "WOW I'll be damned if this isn't the greatest turkey I've ever had! Slap your grandma!"
Jimmy: "OK." ***SMACK!!!*** (pimp-slaps her across the face)
Mom: "Well I never! Jimmy, how could you?"
Dad: "Son, get out of here this instant. You're banished from this family forever."
Jimmy: "But but but..."
Dad: "But but but...SHUT UP!!! Get your elderly-assaulting ass out of my house!"
by Nicholas D May 23, 2008
Get the slap your grandmamug. Investigator 1: "Heavens to Betsy!"
Investigator 2: "You didn't seriously just say that. What is it?"
Investigator 1: "From the looks of these financial records, it looks like the mayor embezzled some of the federal grant money he received to build that water gate to protect the town from floods."
Investigator 2: "Really? Well I'll be a monkey's uncle - you're right!"
Investigator 1: "What to call this scandal...I've got it! Because it's a scandal involving a gate, we can add the prefix 'water-' and call it watergate!"
Investigator 2: "No, that's already taken. I think it would be better, since it's a scandal involving water, to add the suffix '-gate' and call it watergate! No, wait, never mind, that's the same thing."
Investigator 1: "Since it's a scandal involving a water gate, let's add the prefix 'water-' and the suffix '-gate' and call it waterwatergategate!"
Investigator 2: "Brilliant! Just rolls right off the tongue."
Investigator 2: "You didn't seriously just say that. What is it?"
Investigator 1: "From the looks of these financial records, it looks like the mayor embezzled some of the federal grant money he received to build that water gate to protect the town from floods."
Investigator 2: "Really? Well I'll be a monkey's uncle - you're right!"
Investigator 1: "What to call this scandal...I've got it! Because it's a scandal involving a gate, we can add the prefix 'water-' and call it watergate!"
Investigator 2: "No, that's already taken. I think it would be better, since it's a scandal involving water, to add the suffix '-gate' and call it watergate! No, wait, never mind, that's the same thing."
Investigator 1: "Since it's a scandal involving a water gate, let's add the prefix 'water-' and the suffix '-gate' and call it waterwatergategate!"
Investigator 2: "Brilliant! Just rolls right off the tongue."
by Nicholas D December 18, 2011
Get the water-mug. John: "Duuuuude. Last night I consumed a considerable quantity of ethanol. I mean I was totally shit-faced."
Kevin: "What the hell, man, there are kids around. Watch your language. Shit is a terrible word to say. For fuck's sake you inconsiderate cunt."
John: "Oh my bad, I mean fecal-faced. I was drunk as a skunk."
Kevin: "Word to your mother."
Kevin: "What the hell, man, there are kids around. Watch your language. Shit is a terrible word to say. For fuck's sake you inconsiderate cunt."
John: "Oh my bad, I mean fecal-faced. I was drunk as a skunk."
Kevin: "Word to your mother."
by Nicholas D June 19, 2011
Get the fecal-facedmug. To completely and utterly flop. Usually refers to a music album. Whereas successful records can go gold or platinum, this term comes from the fact that wood is a far less valuable material.
"Peckerwood mad cuz his record went wood
No respect in the hood led to his 'Neck of the Woods'
Got in touch with his roots, found the redneck in his blood
And said, 'Heck, country western rap records are good'"
-Eminem, "Quitter" (Everlast diss track)
Tim: "Wassup gangsta!?!?!?"
Bill: "Dude, where'd you get that Porsche?"
Tim: "Oh, I took out a loan from this loan shark in Philly. Cost 45 Gs, mothafucka!"
Bill: "Um, that doesn't sound like a good idea. How are you going to pay for it?"
Tim: "Droppin' my new rap album next month, dogg. It's got some phat beats on it."
Bill: "Rap album? You're a white hick from Hummelstown. Who's going to take that seriously?"
Tim: "Don't make me blast my gat! Haha, just clownin'. Check out this sick beat:
(rapping)'Hummelstown, Hummelstown where we pummels down
Any punk ass mothafucka that come around'
Eminem or Jay-Z couldn't write shit that ill. Next time you see me it's gonna be on the red carpet with fly hoes on each arm."
Bill: "I don't know, man. I think you're going to go wood. You might be cruisin' for a bruisin'."
No respect in the hood led to his 'Neck of the Woods'
Got in touch with his roots, found the redneck in his blood
And said, 'Heck, country western rap records are good'"
-Eminem, "Quitter" (Everlast diss track)
Tim: "Wassup gangsta!?!?!?"
Bill: "Dude, where'd you get that Porsche?"
Tim: "Oh, I took out a loan from this loan shark in Philly. Cost 45 Gs, mothafucka!"
Bill: "Um, that doesn't sound like a good idea. How are you going to pay for it?"
Tim: "Droppin' my new rap album next month, dogg. It's got some phat beats on it."
Bill: "Rap album? You're a white hick from Hummelstown. Who's going to take that seriously?"
Tim: "Don't make me blast my gat! Haha, just clownin'. Check out this sick beat:
(rapping)'Hummelstown, Hummelstown where we pummels down
Any punk ass mothafucka that come around'
Eminem or Jay-Z couldn't write shit that ill. Next time you see me it's gonna be on the red carpet with fly hoes on each arm."
Bill: "I don't know, man. I think you're going to go wood. You might be cruisin' for a bruisin'."
by Nicholas D August 30, 2012
Get the go woodmug. An all-purpose excuse that people use during a recession to justify doing things that are below their usual standard. Often these things in reality have little or nothing to do with the economic circumstances.
Harry: "You took your girlfriend to Applebee's on Valentine's Day? Pretty weak."
Larry: "Whatever man, I didn't have a choice. Bad economy."
Senator: "Mr. Paulson, you really want to give the greedy, soulless bankers who caused this mess $700 billion with no strings attached?"
Henry Paulson: "Hey guys, bad economy. Just do it."
Senator: "Good point. I vote yes."
Fred: "Dude, tell me you didn't go home with that broke down 300-pound whale I saw you with at O'Shea's last night."
Brendan: "Dude, it's a bad economy. I'll take what I can get."
Fred: "Yeah, I guess you have to."
Larry: "Whatever man, I didn't have a choice. Bad economy."
Senator: "Mr. Paulson, you really want to give the greedy, soulless bankers who caused this mess $700 billion with no strings attached?"
Henry Paulson: "Hey guys, bad economy. Just do it."
Senator: "Good point. I vote yes."
Fred: "Dude, tell me you didn't go home with that broke down 300-pound whale I saw you with at O'Shea's last night."
Brendan: "Dude, it's a bad economy. I'll take what I can get."
Fred: "Yeah, I guess you have to."
by Nicholas D March 15, 2009
Get the bad economymug. Attempting to get the worst possible gas mileage. The opposite of hypermiling. Usually done to look like a rebel or to spite the system or environmentalist hippies.
Dave: "What up dogg. Let's head over to Mel's Tavern and throw back some Jager bombs."
Pat: "No can do, broski. I'm all out of cash. Had to fill up the Hummer 4 times this week at $4.50 a gallon."
Dave: "Whaaat? How can you go through that much gas? You don't even drive that much."
Pat: "Hypomiling, man, all the way. I loaded a half-ton of bricks into the trunk, added air shields for extra wind resistance, and of course a full-size fridge in the back that runs off gas. Not to mention accelerating and braking as fast as possible and revving the engine at every stoplight. I've gotten this baby down to 2 miles a gallon!"
Dave: "Um...yeah, that's great, but now you're broke."
Pat: "It's totally worth it! Yesterday I put together a poster of my gas receipts and odometer readings, then showed it to a bunch of people at Whole Foods. You should have seen the looks on their faces. Dirty hippies! I got them good! My carbon footprint is bigger than the Grand Canyon! Hahaha!!! Eat that, Al Gore! I am the greatest hypomiler alive!!! Mwhahahahaha!!!"
Dave: "Dude, you've really lost it this time."
Pat: "No can do, broski. I'm all out of cash. Had to fill up the Hummer 4 times this week at $4.50 a gallon."
Dave: "Whaaat? How can you go through that much gas? You don't even drive that much."
Pat: "Hypomiling, man, all the way. I loaded a half-ton of bricks into the trunk, added air shields for extra wind resistance, and of course a full-size fridge in the back that runs off gas. Not to mention accelerating and braking as fast as possible and revving the engine at every stoplight. I've gotten this baby down to 2 miles a gallon!"
Dave: "Um...yeah, that's great, but now you're broke."
Pat: "It's totally worth it! Yesterday I put together a poster of my gas receipts and odometer readings, then showed it to a bunch of people at Whole Foods. You should have seen the looks on their faces. Dirty hippies! I got them good! My carbon footprint is bigger than the Grand Canyon! Hahaha!!! Eat that, Al Gore! I am the greatest hypomiler alive!!! Mwhahahahaha!!!"
Dave: "Dude, you've really lost it this time."
by Nicholas D June 10, 2008
Get the hypomilingmug. Worker 1: "Did you get your coffee yet?"
Worker 2: "No, I've been stuck in this meeting but I'm joe biden and ready to make a run for the coffee pot as soon as there's a break."
Worker 2: "No, I've been stuck in this meeting but I'm joe biden and ready to make a run for the coffee pot as soon as there's a break."
by Nicholas D July 11, 2022
Get the joe bidenmug.