Monkey's Dad's definitions

Coney

1) An early name for “rabbit.” Historically rhyming with honey, it derives from the French conil, from the Latin cunīculus.

2) The maiden name of Amy Coney Barrett, the present nominee for Supreme Court justice.

It's Coney, but PLEASE do NOT rhyme it with 'honey', which will yield the Olde English slang for female genitalia.

by Monkey's Dad October 14, 2020

impeccably ill-mannered

The quality of knowing how to offend and alienate as many people, in as short a time, as possible.

He was their new neighbor, so comprehensively offensive to everybody that within a couple of weeks of his arrival he was a laughing stock. No one wanted him there. No one was speaking to him, or ever would. He had trained hard to become what he was - impeccably ill-mannered. It was a talent given to few.

by Monkey's Dad May 10, 2021

long distance relationslump

The toll on a couple normally kept apart by distance, now further separated by travel restrictions.

Their New York-L.A. thing had felt dynamic, sharing best-of-both with alternating weeks. After months of facetime but no actual faces, and no actual bodies, they were in a long distance relationslump.

by Monkey's Dad April 17, 2020

Hypocratic Right

In a Hypocractic form of government, the inalienable right to say one thing and do another, as exemplified by Senator Lindsey Graham.

'"Use my words against me" doesn't mean "hold me accountable"', said Graham. "As a Republican, I am exercising my Hypocratic Right to say and do anything I want to."

by Monkey's Dad September 22, 2020

eloqwince

The involuntary cringe when you realize you found the exact words for what should have gone unspoken. Often accompanied by a palm to the forehead.

Here it came again, the eloqwince in the night, remembering his superbly witty toast to the happy couple. Had he really made that joke about his history with the bride? How much would a one-way ticket on the space shuttle cost, he wondered.

by Monkey's Dad March 10, 2020

underlying condition

A pre-existing medical issue that can increase a person's vulnerability to contracting coronavirus and/or dying from it.

Anything which renders someone less than optimally healthy, compromising their immunity.

Being human.

Just being alive felt like an underlying condition. Her asthma was an additional factor, she supposed, but each day she was getting news of yet another person coming down with corona. They were old, middle-aged, young, healthy or not.

by Monkey's Dad March 29, 2020

Generation C

An age group encompassing those born to those reaching adulthood during the COVID-19 pandemic. People born between 2000 and 2021.

Their worldview, their attitudes and their temperaments were shaped by the demands, constraints and pressures of the pandemic. Whether undergoing home-schooling from a masked parent or a teacher on Zoom, or facing severely diminished job prospects, they comprised Generation C.

by Monkey's Dad March 11, 2021