Monkey's Dad's definitions
Don't stand in the midst of a crowded bar, don't hug and kiss strangers, don't take selfies with friends... because it could kill you. Yes, really. Lots of people already know this. It's called social duhstancing.
by Monkey's Dad June 18, 2020
Get the social duhstancingmug. Scorning Bernie for his 'socialist' ideas, then cheering Trump for promising to write everyone a check.
How dare they criticize her anti-socialist behavior?! Bernie wanted to give everyone free healthcare! Because he is Communist! Donald the self-made millionaire is going to send every American some free money, which they can spend any way they want, on beer and bullets, keeping the government out of everyone's life!
by Monkey's Dad March 26, 2020
Get the Anti-Socialist Behaviormug. The minimum number of quarantined, work-from-home members that must be logged into an online video meeting to make the proceedings valid.
As the Zoom leader waited for the tenth member to sign in, unable to begin until the meeting had a quorumtine, she wondered whether they would ever see each other again in the real world.
by Monkey's Dad April 2, 2020
Get the quorumtinemug. "If I die, I die", she said. "I'm not letting anyone convince me to get that shot". And no one convinced her, and she went maskless to her early grave, a proud vaxxophobe, and an example of how America had been made "great again".
by Monkey's Dad July 25, 2021
Get the vaxxophobemug. She carefully typed it in. F-L-U-F-F-Y, her all-time favorite pussword, which nobody would ever guess.
by Monkey's Dad September 15, 2021
Get the Pusswordmug. The misanthrope's currently-plausible excuse.
"We can't be too careful, can we?", he said, avoiding his friend's extended elbow and backing away. While everyone was doing it, he'd always done it, his antisocial distancing now conveniently disguised as responsible social distancing.
by Monkey's Dad March 14, 2020
Get the antisocial distancingmug. A strangely-nonexistent German word meaning "Taking pleasure in another person's success", the theoretical opposite of 'schadenfreude' - a word which has long existed in German and has migrated into English, meaning "Taking pleasure in another person's misery and suffering ".
Hearing that his colleague had won the Nobel, Schmidt was overcome with erfolgfreude and immediately called to offer his profound and heartfelt admiration.
by Monkey's Dad February 28, 2020
Get the Erfolgfreudemug.