4 definition by Mick O'Neill

Person 1: "My ass itches."

Person 2: "Maybe you have ass nazis."

Person 1: "Yeah, I guess I'll have to eat some baked beans to flush 'em outta there."

Person 2: "Good idea."

Person 1: "Fuel Injection is so much more reliable than carburetors."

Person 2: "Uhh, okay. Is that why your car has been to the shop three times and the 'check engine' light is still on?"

Person 1: "It was just a bad sensor."

Person 2: "How much did it cost to fix?"

Person 1: "$238."

Person 2: "I could replace the entire fuel system on my car for $238."

Person 1: "But..."

Person 2: "No."

Person 1: "I was..."

Person 2: "NO! YOU WILL BOW DOWN BEFORE THE ALMIGHTY 1972 LINCOLN CONTINENTAL! (holds lincoln keychain in face)

Person 1: "AAAAH! IT BURNS!"

Person 2: "THE POWER OF GOD COMPELLS YOU!

Person 1: "NOOO! (black vomit) (convulsions)

Person 2: "Damn, you must've worked at a dealership."

Person 1: " '75 LTD coupe convertible?"

Person 2: "Now you're talking."

"During World War II, German engineers developed some of the world's first jet fighters. Among these was the messershit ME-262."

Person 1: "Tom's ride is so pimp."

Person 2: "What? You mean that Ass Navigator he picked up at the police auction last summer? That thing's had the shit kicked out of it real bad."

Person 1: "It's still cool, though."

Person 2: "Yeah. At least he has a car. Unlike some people I know."

Person 1: "Hey, shut up!"

Person 2: "Hahahahahaha!"