Mark H's definitions

horizontal sumo wrestling

When two fat people have sex with(or make love to) each other.

When Jeff(a little scrawny sexually frustrated guy who likes to peek into other peoples' dorm rooms to look for and watch certain people having sex) snuck his eyes into one dorm room with the sounds of intense sexual activity emanating from it, he was all of a sudden scarred for life and lost his lunch when he saw two broke down Tri Delt bitches engaging in the act of horizontal sumo wrestling and giving each other Hot Karl.





Mark H. Urban Dictionary afficionado since February 2004.

by Mark H December 14, 2004

e-sturbation

1. Expression of sexual gratification online via cybersex.

2. Masturbation to anything else that happens online and/or that is viewed that is sexually gratifying.

1. I am e-sturbating furiously right now! (message typed as the guy has cybersex with this hot Swedish chick.)

2. Hey hold on! I'm very busy e-sturbating to these lesbo pics of Aria Giovanni at her official site!

by Mark H August 25, 2004

Mexican Car Stereo

What you might get to have in your car if you are too dirt cheap to afford a real car stereo. It may consist of either:

A). You or someone else in your car keeping(or at least trying to keep) everyone entertained by singing songs and/or making "music" by making sounds with your mouth and tapping and banging on objects with your limbs.

Or:

B). Having an entire band of musicians in your vehicle playing for you(particularly if they are not playing electronic instruments). This is a more logical alternative if you're driving a vehicle with enough room, like say a van, or a large truck.

Optional: Both methods can also be accompanied by having a Mexican subwoofer along.

Ex 1: FFS, man someone tell that Mexican car stereo back there to shut up!! I'm trying to enjoy our new system here!

Ex 2:
Doug: Now what, Wayne? How are we supposed to enjoy our trip on the open road now that the fucking border cops have found our Mexican car stereo and dumped 'em all in the Rio along with all their mariachi gear?
Truck Driver: No worries, Doug, at least we've got a little somethin' for ya to play an equally pleasing tune on. *unzips pants*
Doug: Awwww yeah. *goes down on truck driver's lap*

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Mark H. Bringing you more funny defs since February 2004.

by Mark H November 18, 2006

dig bick

A spoonerism of the words "big dick." The first letters of the two words are switched around the same way as in the words "tig ol bitties."

1. I've got such a dig bick, which is one of the reasons sinful ladies love me!

2. That movie really sucked dig bick.

3. My dig bick. Your tig ol bitties. Yeah we are the perfect sex couple!

by Mark H July 19, 2004

riding high

1.To be feeling very happy. Occasionally also meaning in a snobbish or egotistical way.
2.To be experiencing euphoric intoxication through drugs.

1a. Nick D was so riding high when he scored two very hot babes by pulling the beirut trick.

1b.
Nerdy kid in math class: Woooo! I passed the test! Wooohoo, I'm so smart! *prances all over the classroom like a ninny*
Normal kid:(talking to a fellow classmate about the nerd) He sure is riding high, isn't he?

2.

Cop: You know sir, you don't seem to realize that you are speeding and swerving a little on your side of the road.
TJ: Uh was I? Really? *giggles* No sir, I havn't drank any.
Cop: No you don't look drunk. I see you are shaking a bit and have that goofy grin on your face. You sure are feeling very happy right now aren't you.
TJ: Oooh yeah! I am RIDING HIGH!!
Cop: And you are fucking going to be riding in the back of my police car with me taking you on an up north trip! That is a bag of crack rock that I see on your dashboard! NOW GET OUT!
Caleb: Oh shit.
TJ: Here, have a donut. *pulls out a fresh Krispy Kreme donut and hands it to the cop*
Cop: Thanks. *scarfs down donut* But still, you are coming with me!
TJ and Caleb: Haaaahahahahaha!
Cop: *pulling TJ out* Now what is so funny? Getting in trouble with the LAW is not funny!
Caleb: It's funny because it's poisonous!
Cop: No, you are both stupid drug-addicted morons. *reaches for handcuffs*
Caleb: In layman's terms, I laced that donut, which you just ate, with DDT! Fucking hilarious!
Cop: WHAT THE!? You... *gags, tries to pull out his gun, but falls dead on the ground face first*
TJ: *laughing* Alright, Caleb you da man! You a genious! *gets back in the car*
Caleb: I try. *high fives TJ* Now let's go.





Mark H. Urban Addict since February 2004.

by Mark H November 11, 2004

wookie

When you shave your pubic hair and then ejaculate(or do the Emeril) onto your woman's face and throw the shaved-off pubic hair all over her face.

Also known as a sasquatch.

I cummed all over Sarah's face and then covered all of her face with my pubic hair. Now she looks like Chewbacca.

by Mark H September 11, 2004

lips, legs, breasts, and ass

Four key external features that a man of taste first sees in a fit, healthy, and attractive young woman.

Quagmire, a sex-crazed character from the hit TV show Family Guy once called a woman this.

Quote from the Family Guy show:

Child Services Woman: Hello.
Quagmire: HEY, GET THE HELL OFF MY LAWN--well hello lips, legs, breasts, and ass!





Mark H. Urban Addict since February 2004.

by Mark H November 21, 2004