Lynch/Fellini's definitions

The Rind of Zayo Da Dong

A piece of history documented in Brett Keane's magnum opera Eternal Undying Love. It refers to a time when an evil atheist dictator named "Zayo Da Dong" killed a bunch of fellow atheists during his "rind" in China.

Brett Keane: What happens if they decide they don't like another atheist out there? Well. History seems to show us, all the way back to the day of Joseph Stalin, atheist dictator killed six million people, how many of those people do you think were other atheists, huh? How many atheists do you think got killed during the RIND OF ZAYO DA DONG? What a fucked up name that guy's got, right?

by Lynch/Fellini July 24, 2021

Couch Humper

People who like to have sex with couches.

J.D. Vance is a couch humper.

by Lynch/Fellini August 19, 2024

The Glenn Beck Defense

A synonym for JAQing Off, this phrase was named after right wing commentator Glenn Beck, who became famous for spewing conspiracy theories and hate fueled rhetoric under the guise of asking questions. His usage of this defense became so notorious that South Park famously mocked him for it.

"I'm not saying that they were good people, I'm just asking if the Jan 6 rioters were really Republicans or if they were Democrats in disguise?"
"Quit pulling The Glenn Beck Defense moron!"

by Lynch/Fellini May 30, 2023

Eternal Undying Love

A novel written by known internet scam artist, Brett Keane. It is filled to the brim with grammatical and spelling errors and notorious for its incoherent plot and overabundance of characters, many of whom have bizarre and lazily crafted names like "Josabeph" and "Detective Reznor".

"Hey did you read the Manatee's book? He calls NAMBLA MABLA at one point"
"You mean Eternal Undying Love? I couldn't get past the first page, it was too incoherent to read."

by Lynch/Fellini May 30, 2023

Gor Series

A series of poorly written and highly misogynistic science fiction books written by John Norman. What started out as a bad John Carter knockoff quickly devolved into incel fantasies that push the idea that women can only be their true selves as sex slaves subservient to the will of men. They inspired the cultish Gorean subculture.

If you ever want to read a book that will make you lose hope for humanity, just read one of the books from the Gor Series.

by Lynch/Fellini June 1, 2023

John Norman

A science fiction author and former college professor best known for creating the Gor Series. His books have been described as some of the worst ever written, with criticism being directed at their bad proses, unoriginal stories, and highly misogynistic worldviews. His fanbase consists mostly of incels, as they are the only ones who agree that the only way for women to be happy is as sex slaves.

Despite being almost universally hated, Norman is under the delusion that he is the world's most important writer and has gone so far as to compare himself to Socrates and Nietzsche.

If you ever want to see the precursor to Jordan Peterson, look up John Norman.

by Lynch/Fellini June 1, 2023

J.D. Vance

The couch humper who Donald Trump selected to be his running mate in the 2024 election.

Did you see the mascara running down the face of that couch humper J.D. Vance?

by Lynch/Fellini August 9, 2024