Long Johns's definitions
When you have no idea of what for, or what it is, where it comes from, how it got there, or even why, however. Keeping the stupid cow decided to go milking it.
A young farm lass had been given a gift, a cow.
Tessa: "Thanks! I think, what is it?!"
Giver: "It's a cow...."
Tessa: "What should I do with it?"
Giver: "I'm not sure, I was hoping you will know?"
Tessa: "Is it a boy or girl, from the look of those....abit unusual?"
Giver: "This is why I don't want it. And think you can make sense of it."
Tessa: "Well, ok....I'll take a look at it...you sure it's called a cow?!"
Giver: "Positive.....when I bought it, someone said, 'finally got rid of the moany old cow'.."
Tessa: "Well, would you know, something seems to be coming out of these dangly things..."
Giver: "Think you might be milking it now..."
Tessa: "Thanks! I think, what is it?!"
Giver: "It's a cow...."
Tessa: "What should I do with it?"
Giver: "I'm not sure, I was hoping you will know?"
Tessa: "Is it a boy or girl, from the look of those....abit unusual?"
Giver: "This is why I don't want it. And think you can make sense of it."
Tessa: "Well, ok....I'll take a look at it...you sure it's called a cow?!"
Giver: "Positive.....when I bought it, someone said, 'finally got rid of the moany old cow'.."
Tessa: "Well, would you know, something seems to be coming out of these dangly things..."
Giver: "Think you might be milking it now..."
by Long Johns October 30, 2014
Get the Milking itmug. What seems larger in scale, whatever the object to be, is actually smaller to take. Something that is being supported by another source. A teacup on a saucer.
Janet thought her income would be much more from the looks of things. Only John being the supported one, realistically Janet only had the teacup on a saucer.
by Long Johns February 12, 2013
Get the Teacup on a saucermug. Any job done by someone else who are distracted or careless with their work and make a total bodge Job of it.
Also known as Botch Job.
Also known as Botch Job.
Bob - "I'll have this done in no time."
Customer - "That is what I was worried about, a bodge job."
Or;
Craig - "Yes love, I be there. Ok hun, see you later."
Customer - "Will you be getting on with your work or be on the phone all day and make a total bodge job?"
Or;
Apprentice - "I think I finished the job boss."
Boss - "You made a right bodge job of that haven't you"
Customer - "That is what I was worried about, a bodge job."
Or;
Craig - "Yes love, I be there. Ok hun, see you later."
Customer - "Will you be getting on with your work or be on the phone all day and make a total bodge job?"
Or;
Apprentice - "I think I finished the job boss."
Boss - "You made a right bodge job of that haven't you"
by Long Johns August 1, 2012
Get the Bodge Jobmug. Since Joany went on that reality audition show and got recognised in the street, she's been acting very clanky lately.
by Long Johns August 11, 2016
Get the Clankymug. Gullible to be taken in - with your Jewish friends and secret Jehovah Witnesses friends or anyother friends of another religion - that convince you they too celebrate Christmas but only to accept your generous kind-hearted hand-outs. Only to later pass on your gifts for other purposes.
Jonny gave his best mate a big present this year for Christmas. Only Jonny later discovered his mate was not a Christian who celebrates Christmas, so gave a gift away for no reason and now feels stupid and made an utter Christmastake.
by Long Johns December 26, 2011
Get the Christmastakemug. Jo was acting very splompee today, her priorities were all over the place. And were talking in slurring terms.
by Long Johns May 27, 2017
Get the Splompeemug.