Definitions by Long Johns
Bodge Job
Any job done by someone else who are distracted or careless with their work and make a total bodge Job of it.
Also known as Botch Job.
Also known as Botch Job.
Bob - "I'll have this done in no time."
Customer - "That is what I was worried about, a bodge job."
Or;
Craig - "Yes love, I be there. Ok hun, see you later."
Customer - "Will you be getting on with your work or be on the phone all day and make a total bodge job?"
Or;
Apprentice - "I think I finished the job boss."
Boss - "You made a right bodge job of that haven't you"
Customer - "That is what I was worried about, a bodge job."
Or;
Craig - "Yes love, I be there. Ok hun, see you later."
Customer - "Will you be getting on with your work or be on the phone all day and make a total bodge job?"
Or;
Apprentice - "I think I finished the job boss."
Boss - "You made a right bodge job of that haven't you"
Bodge Job by Long Johns August 1, 2012
Shopping angel
Usually performed by women, spending all day shopping and carrying home all the vast bags they now own. Throw themselves in amongst them all and wave their arms and legs about to resemble an angel. Typically done due for over-exhausted excitement!
Sally spent all day shopping, carrying home 2 to the dozen of bags. Finally back home and feeling exhausted, the first thing she did on returning home is throw herself in amongst all her bags and did a shopping angel.
Shopping angel by Long Johns February 28, 2012
Circumcision
To have sex with others without being unfaithful to your true heart, as the connecting flowing feelings are not of real when to compare with your real heartfelt lover.
Controlling the flowing love through circumcision, the veins disconnect the heart from the sexual tension you may gain for wanting sex with someone else.
Circumcision by Long Johns January 23, 2012
Christmastake
Gullible to be taken in - with your Jewish friends and secret Jehovah Witnesses friends or anyother friends of another religion - that convince you they too celebrate Christmas but only to accept your generous kind-hearted hand-outs. Only to later pass on your gifts for other purposes.
Jonny gave his best mate a big present this year for Christmas. Only Jonny later discovered his mate was not a Christian who celebrates Christmas, so gave a gift away for no reason and now feels stupid and made an utter Christmastake.
Christmastake by Long Johns December 26, 2011
Elephart
When you have that bloated gut feeling to go to the toilet, thinking it will be a No.2. But then, the echoes from the toilet bowl encourages the wind released to resemble an elephant farting.....
Jay had a bad case to rush to the toilet for feeling winded. Only his gut feeling was only that, wind and gave off a loud elephart.
Elephart by Long Johns November 30, 2011
Twix
Someone who wishes to have threesomes or foursomes or thensomes.....when there is only two to the pack but wants more.
Guy: 'I fancy a threesome'.
Girl: 'But there is only two in the pack'.
Guy: 'Don't worry we can improvise'.
Girl: 'Stop being such a twix'.
Girl: 'But there is only two in the pack'.
Guy: 'Don't worry we can improvise'.
Girl: 'Stop being such a twix'.
Twix by Long Johns September 7, 2011