L.MARTIN's definitions
A defining moment when you realize the gods are aligned against you in pursuit of a goal...That and the realization that your handlers/advisors are either stupid or covertly sabotaging you.In either case they should all be fired.
ANCHORMAN:"Subsequent candidates looking to challenge SENATOR CLINTON have all suffered a PAGE 10 MOMENT. Leaving her little choice but to polish her acceptance speech."
by L.MARTIN December 7, 2005
Get the PAGE 10 MOMENT mug.by L.MARTIN September 15, 2005
Get the Mash mug.1)The root cause of divorce.
2)The most successful wealth transfer scheme ever invented.
3)A contract-that if presented to you by an agent/lawyer-would
be sufficient grounds for a legal malpractice suit.
4)One sure way that the state can stay involved in your
life.FOREVER.
5)The point at which regular good sex stops...and infrequent
sex for procreation,manipulation,and/or passive-aggressive
destruction begins.
6)An institution that should be scrapped in favor of 1-3-5
year contracts...Not that you'll be any happier.
2)The most successful wealth transfer scheme ever invented.
3)A contract-that if presented to you by an agent/lawyer-would
be sufficient grounds for a legal malpractice suit.
4)One sure way that the state can stay involved in your
life.FOREVER.
5)The point at which regular good sex stops...and infrequent
sex for procreation,manipulation,and/or passive-aggressive
destruction begins.
6)An institution that should be scrapped in favor of 1-3-5
year contracts...Not that you'll be any happier.
by L.MARTIN July 5, 2006
Get the MARRIAGE mug.TIPSY-ABOUT TO GET SHUT DOWN ON A DATE-LOSER:"Sex is just so poorly designed."(hiccup)
WOMAN:"Oh?"
LOSER:"Yep.It should be free!":
"Pregnancy free."
"Disease free."
"Barrier free."
"Commitment free."
"Drama free."
"Cost free."
"You know...FREE!"
"...And it should come in nice "8" or higher
packaging."
WOMAN:"Check please."
WOMAN:"Oh?"
LOSER:"Yep.It should be free!":
"Pregnancy free."
"Disease free."
"Barrier free."
"Commitment free."
"Drama free."
"Cost free."
"You know...FREE!"
"...And it should come in nice "8" or higher
packaging."
WOMAN:"Check please."
by L.MARTIN September 23, 2005
Get the FREE mug.1)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology that mysteriously becomes
less reliable for a woman-the wealthier a man is.
2)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology that has been available-in
at least nine different forms to women-for now about
50 YEARS.(There's only two for men:Condom.Vasectomy.)This means nine different forms BEFORE you even
touch abortion or sterilization...But "unplanned"/unwanted
kids still get here.
3)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology-available more to women
than men.Yet newsmedia continues to blame men for
irresponsible breeding.Interesting.I've never met a man
who decided when a baby would be born.
less reliable for a woman-the wealthier a man is.
2)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology that has been available-in
at least nine different forms to women-for now about
50 YEARS.(There's only two for men:Condom.Vasectomy.)This means nine different forms BEFORE you even
touch abortion or sterilization...But "unplanned"/unwanted
kids still get here.
3)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology-available more to women
than men.Yet newsmedia continues to blame men for
irresponsible breeding.Interesting.I've never met a man
who decided when a baby would be born.
SPORTS ANCHOR:"On the day of the draft-the now rich,young QUARTERBACK
found himself served with PATERNITY SUIT papers."
CHICK TO DUDE:"It's okay.I'm on the BIRTH CONTROL pill.My
doctor says I can't get pregnant anyway.I
just want to FEEL you."
SAME CHICK TO GIRLFRIEND 90 DAYS LATER:"I don't know how it
happened.I was'nt planning on this...but I
don't believe in abortion.Sooo..."
found himself served with PATERNITY SUIT papers."
CHICK TO DUDE:"It's okay.I'm on the BIRTH CONTROL pill.My
doctor says I can't get pregnant anyway.I
just want to FEEL you."
SAME CHICK TO GIRLFRIEND 90 DAYS LATER:"I don't know how it
happened.I was'nt planning on this...but I
don't believe in abortion.Sooo..."
by L.MARTIN September 3, 2006
Get the BIRTH CONTROL mug.A 20something man who lands a hot female his age or slightly older.(no more than 5 years)He's muscular,pretty,and fucks the daylights outta her.Too bad he's broke.She's out whoring around with "WEALTHY MEN WHO CAN..."but has LAPDOG for emotional comfort and workouts at the gym.He don't really wanna know what the deal is 'bout that nice condo and the Porsche Boxster.All relationships are temporary...and this one's no different:She'll either
dump him when "MR.BIG STAMPS" decides to take her private...
Or when he returns to being ALPHA DOG as opposed to safe LAPDOG.
dump him when "MR.BIG STAMPS" decides to take her private...
Or when he returns to being ALPHA DOG as opposed to safe LAPDOG.
GYM RAT 1:"Wassup wit'Dylan and that chick he trains with?
He don't hang wit' us no mo'."
GYM RAT 2:"Yeah...Never seen homie play LAPDOG like this
before.Must be pussy whipped."
He don't hang wit' us no mo'."
GYM RAT 2:"Yeah...Never seen homie play LAPDOG like this
before.Must be pussy whipped."
by L.MARTIN October 30, 2005
Get the LAPDOG mug.The biological certainty that your wife,heavy-duty girlfriend,significant other-will guiltlessly fuck someone wealthier and/or more famous than you...should the opportunity
present itself.Remember:She thinks she coulda' done better.
present itself.Remember:She thinks she coulda' done better.
WIFE:"Honey...is'nt that Derek Jeter over there at the table in the corner?"
HUSBAND:"Sure is!Go Yankees!"
WIFE:"Gotta go to the ladies room."
HUSBAND OF SECOND COUPLE IN DINING FOURSOME:"While you're in there...tuck your GROUPIE GENE back in.It's showing!"
WIFE OF SECOND COUPLE IN DINING FOURSOME:"I'll go check on her."
HUSBAND:"Sure is!Go Yankees!"
WIFE:"Gotta go to the ladies room."
HUSBAND OF SECOND COUPLE IN DINING FOURSOME:"While you're in there...tuck your GROUPIE GENE back in.It's showing!"
WIFE OF SECOND COUPLE IN DINING FOURSOME:"I'll go check on her."
by L.MARTIN October 14, 2005
Get the GROUPIE GENE mug.