L.MARTIN's definitions
TITLED AFTER FRANK ZAPPA SONG:Someone who makes impulsive, grand scale decisions involving large amounts of money-(usually other peoples')...Facts,consequences and reality be damned.Cocaine is'nt always involved.It just looks that way.
ENRON EXEC.1:"Let's just set up a state-of-the-art trading floor.We'll find something to trade on it later."
ENRON EXEC.2:"What?Are you tootin' rails?That's the most COCAINE DECISION I've ever heard. We'll all go to jail!
ENRON EXEC.3:"Dammit play ball!...I have options on 1,000,000
shares.They vest if it looks like we're doing something."
ENRON EXEC.2:"What?Are you tootin' rails?That's the most COCAINE DECISION I've ever heard. We'll all go to jail!
ENRON EXEC.3:"Dammit play ball!...I have options on 1,000,000
shares.They vest if it looks like we're doing something."
by L.MARTIN December 10, 2005
Get the COCAINE DECISION mug.This isn't about skin color so much as it's about the way we discriminate in these modern times:INCOME,EDUCATION,CLASS.
It's a mindset that thinks a million dollars for a one room condo is a bargain...that paying a thousand dollars for two
30 dollar bottles of vodka and a place to sit comfortably is just a good night out...that 1500 dollar an hour pussy is somehow better than 300 dollar an hour pussy...that bidding up the price on goods and services somehow puts you a cut above everyone.
It's a mindset that thinks a million dollars for a one room condo is a bargain...that paying a thousand dollars for two
30 dollar bottles of vodka and a place to sit comfortably is just a good night out...that 1500 dollar an hour pussy is somehow better than 300 dollar an hour pussy...that bidding up the price on goods and services somehow puts you a cut above everyone.
by L.MARTIN January 15, 2006
Get the RICH WHITE GUY mug.1)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology that mysteriously becomes
less reliable for a woman-the wealthier a man is.
2)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology that has been available-in
at least nine different forms to women-for now about
50 YEARS.(There's only two for men:Condom.Vasectomy.)This means nine different forms BEFORE you even
touch abortion or sterilization...But "unplanned"/unwanted
kids still get here.
3)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology-available more to women
than men.Yet newsmedia continues to blame men for
irresponsible breeding.Interesting.I've never met a man
who decided when a baby would be born.
less reliable for a woman-the wealthier a man is.
2)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology that has been available-in
at least nine different forms to women-for now about
50 YEARS.(There's only two for men:Condom.Vasectomy.)This means nine different forms BEFORE you even
touch abortion or sterilization...But "unplanned"/unwanted
kids still get here.
3)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology-available more to women
than men.Yet newsmedia continues to blame men for
irresponsible breeding.Interesting.I've never met a man
who decided when a baby would be born.
SPORTS ANCHOR:"On the day of the draft-the now rich,young QUARTERBACK
found himself served with PATERNITY SUIT papers."
CHICK TO DUDE:"It's okay.I'm on the BIRTH CONTROL pill.My
doctor says I can't get pregnant anyway.I
just want to FEEL you."
SAME CHICK TO GIRLFRIEND 90 DAYS LATER:"I don't know how it
happened.I was'nt planning on this...but I
don't believe in abortion.Sooo..."
found himself served with PATERNITY SUIT papers."
CHICK TO DUDE:"It's okay.I'm on the BIRTH CONTROL pill.My
doctor says I can't get pregnant anyway.I
just want to FEEL you."
SAME CHICK TO GIRLFRIEND 90 DAYS LATER:"I don't know how it
happened.I was'nt planning on this...but I
don't believe in abortion.Sooo..."
by L.MARTIN September 3, 2006
Get the BIRTH CONTROL mug.A 30something to 50something man of modest to respectable accomplishment who lands an attractive but no longer hot
female.She's either been buried in her own professional
accomplishments and finally looked up to find those men she
competes with are only interested in "young n'tight"...Or she's badly overplayed her hand and now finds that the trips to Tahiti and leased Benzos are'nt part of the picture anymore at that 30something range.In steps the CADDY.To him-she's quite a catch.To her-he will just have to do."Here...hold my purse while I try these shoes on."
female.She's either been buried in her own professional
accomplishments and finally looked up to find those men she
competes with are only interested in "young n'tight"...Or she's badly overplayed her hand and now finds that the trips to Tahiti and leased Benzos are'nt part of the picture anymore at that 30something range.In steps the CADDY.To him-she's quite a catch.To her-he will just have to do."Here...hold my purse while I try these shoes on."
CHICK:"Alberto!...how nice to see you!(hug)Hope everything is
well."
CADDY:"Who was that?"
CHICK:"Just a dear friend from my investment banking days in
New York.Don't forget my shopping bags."
well."
CADDY:"Who was that?"
CHICK:"Just a dear friend from my investment banking days in
New York.Don't forget my shopping bags."
by L.MARTIN October 30, 2005
Get the CADDY mug.The financial number at which you can opt not to work.It's different for everyone...but generally speaking...if you buy into the "American Way of Life"...that number is somewhere around 5million liquid.At that point-you have a barrier against "the unforseen"(illness/injury)...or the fully known. (divorce/criminal children)Hefty appettite for booze,sex,and gambling?Triple that number.
Between his ex-wives,children,and jet set travel-James the attorney has a higher FUCK YOU NUMBER than Joe the plumbing contractor.
by L.MARTIN September 26, 2005
Get the FUCK YOU NUMBER mug.While many beautiful women may post their profile and picture on an internet dating site...the only ones that you MR. AVERAGE JOE HETEROSEXUAL will hook up with are the 5's...and SINGLE MOTHERS.The 8,9,10 girl has her picture up for ego-grat
purposes.She's only available if you can somehow PROVE INCOME.
You know what I mean.
purposes.She's only available if you can somehow PROVE INCOME.
You know what I mean.
HONEST DRINKIN' BUDDY #1:"It's been awhile.I just had to clear the pipes.Hooked up with this cute single mom off MATCH.Not goin' back."
HONEST DRINKIN' BUDDY #2:"Yeah...I'm doin'okay now but awhile back I found myself in bed with this gnarly 5 off MYSPACE.I guess that's just INTERNET DATING REALITY."
HONEST DRINKIN' BUDDY #2:"Yeah...I'm doin'okay now but awhile back I found myself in bed with this gnarly 5 off MYSPACE.I guess that's just INTERNET DATING REALITY."
by L.MARTIN January 15, 2006
Get the INTERNET DATING REALITY mug.The increasing number of fast food entities that share the same space...i.e. PIZZA HUT/TACO BELL...KFC/A&W...ETC.
ROAD WARRIOR:"Hey...let's pull off the freeway n' get some
quick grub at the McTACOHUT comin' up.
SIDE KICK: "Yep."
quick grub at the McTACOHUT comin' up.
SIDE KICK: "Yep."
by L.MARTIN September 26, 2005
Get the McTACOHUT mug.