Definitions by Kayl

scrum

the wrinkled skin of a ballsack

"I gaggled some scrum last night and I'm still picking the pubes out of my teeth!"
"TMI."

scrum by Kayl July 2, 2019

Pantser 

Remember that old commercial for the Clapper? "Clap on, clap off, clap on clap off...The Clapper."

A Pantser is someone of either gender who is a major slut, so much so that their activities can be summed up as "pants on, pants off, pants on pants off...The Pantser!"

Guy #1: Dude, did you hear about Mike? He thinks he has the clap.

Guy #2: I wouldn't be surprised. He's a bit of a Pantser; he left the bar last Friday with three dodgy-looking skanks I wouldn't have touched with a ten-foot pole.

Pantser by Kayl February 11, 2010

failcake 

1. All that is fail, or that could be descibed as such.

2. A cake eaten by those that fail.

3. A urinal cake.

"Man, I am such a failcake that I ate a failcake."

"Please, for the sake of my sanity, elaborate."

failcake by Kayl February 22, 2009

hooker's holiday

One's period. The connotations should be obvious.

"Hey, wanna go hang out at the mall?"

"Nah, I'm on hooker's holiday. I think I'll take some Midol and have a nap."

hooker's holiday by Kayl August 1, 2008

hummus 

An interesting, seemingly multipurpose chickpea concoction that plays a ubiquitous role in the Adam Sandler film You Don't Mess With The Zohan.

"What is hummus?"

"It's a very tasty, diarrhea-like substance!"

hummus by Kayl June 13, 2008

merriam-webster.com 

The awesomest website ever, both for its unparalleled collection of English words and its all-purpose audio pronunciations.

1. I wonder what "agglutinative" means...*click click*...aha! Now I know and shall forever treasure the knowledge.

2. Fun-loving wordophile: Heheheh...hey dude, check this out...

Dude: What is it?

Fun-loving wordophile: Listen...*click* -you- *click* -are- *click* -a- *click* -dick- *click* -wad-

Dude: Holy shit, that's brilliant.

Fun-loving wordophile: I know, I love merriam-webster.com. There's nothing quite like perverting helpful knowledge for the purpose of juvenile diversion!

Dude: Wow. You need to get off there, Mr. Wordy Pants.

merriam-webster.com by Kayl June 13, 2008

sprained brain 

What happens when you think more than you're accustomed to without properly stretching your brain first. Can result in serious brain pain and possibly permanent brain malfunction. Can be caused by overstudying, overthinking, overphilosophizing, and the chronic use of hallucinogens, which can decrease brain function and thus make an accidental sprain more likely.

Person: I've got my calculus class at 7am tomorrow...aauughh....

Friend: Oh yeah, I took that one last semester. I got a sprained brain from it, make sure you stretch before class.

Person: ...how...do you stretch your brain?

Friend: I dunno, but it gives you an interesting visual, doesn't it?

sprained brain by Kayl June 12, 2008