5 definitions by Just another clown
Skagats (shit in the eye) is a word describing crusty stuff you may find in the corner of your eyes upon waking up
by Just another clown June 21, 2020
The Nassau is a type of wager in golf that is essentially three separate bets. Money is wagered on the best score on each of the front nine (holes 1–9), back nine (holes 10–18), and total 18 holes. The Nassau is one of golf's most classic and best known wagers. It is also known by the size of the bets, e.g. "2-2-2" or "5-5-5", etc. Enhancements to the rules include a Nassau Press (bet) and the Hog Press, Renaming for convenience is common at various clubs when rules are adjusted to suit club demographics. The Usual (bet) is one example. The purpose is to avoid explaining the basic rules including applicable Junk (bets) over and over to the same damn clowns who just can’t remember (or pretend not to remember) the rules of the game.
Golfer 1 - Gents, I have a suggestion. Let’s play a traditional $5 Nassau today, sound good?
Golfer 2 – Oh my God…you’re such a fuckin’ pussy with this $5 Nassau shit…fine…whatever!!
Golfer 2 – Oh my God…you’re such a fuckin’ pussy with this $5 Nassau shit…fine…whatever!!
by Just another clown June 19, 2020
Junk (bet) – Referred to as Dots, the bet involves earning a point, or Dot, for predetermined achievements during a round of golf. Dots are assigned a monetary value, say $1. Dots include, but are not limited to: Birdie, Chippie, Greenie, Mongolian Reversal (bet), Sandie, Barkie, Rockie, and the elusive Skullie (bet), almost earned by one of the clowns at the road on 4.
by Just another clown June 21, 2020
The Nassau Press is a side bet, in addition to the original bet, offered during a Nassau match by the side that is losing in an effort to even their money for either the front nine, back nine or overall. If the player who "presses" (offers the press) then beats his opponent over the remaining holes on a given nine or the overall, he wins the press bet. In effect it is a double-or-nothing proposition. When a side/overall is two or more points down in the match, they may request a press. The opposition has the option to accept or reject the press, although it is usually accepted. See Hog Press for a variation to these rules.
The press bet runs for only the remaining holes to be played on either the front nine, back nine holes or overall. In addition, a press on overall (the entire 18 holes) by the losing opponent will continue throughout the match as a new bet even up at the time of the press. For true junkies, Press bets can themselves be pressed if the player falls two points behind on the press bet. The amount of the press bet is the same as the original match bet. For example, in a $2 Nassau, presses are for $2. This is basically a double-or-nothing proposition for the player in the lead.
The press bet runs for only the remaining holes to be played on either the front nine, back nine holes or overall. In addition, a press on overall (the entire 18 holes) by the losing opponent will continue throughout the match as a new bet even up at the time of the press. For true junkies, Press bets can themselves be pressed if the player falls two points behind on the press bet. The amount of the press bet is the same as the original match bet. For example, in a $2 Nassau, presses are for $2. This is basically a double-or-nothing proposition for the player in the lead.
Losing Team – Ok, we’re 2 down so we’re calling a Nassau Press…good luck gentleman, may the best team win!
Leading Team – Ha! They don’t call us Ice and Black Jack for nothing! Kiss that money goodbye suckers!! Heck we went 73 and 74 in Four Ball Finals 5 years ago…best rounds of the year…on the same day!!
Leading Team – Ha! They don’t call us Ice and Black Jack for nothing! Kiss that money goodbye suckers!! Heck we went 73 and 74 in Four Ball Finals 5 years ago…best rounds of the year…on the same day!!
by Just another clown June 21, 2020
The 'Hog Press' of Norfolk is a closing ‘double or nothing’ bet placed against an opponent prior to playing the final hole of the round. It can only be placed by the team (or individual) who irrefutably lost bet(s) made through the second to last hole. Bet(s) still undecided heading into the final hole do not factor. The Hog Press can’t be denied and its value is equivalent to the total amount lost, no more or no less. To ‘win’ the Hog Press you must win the final hole outright. A win by the team who placed the Hog Press results in no obligation to pay the press value however a loss requires payment equal to double the press value. A tie results in payment of the original value. There’s no such thing as a baby hog press, a guinea pig, etc, that’s for pussies.
Losing team on the 18th tee box: – ‘None of it matters anyhow…I’m just gonna Hog Press. Game on mother fuckers!
His partner: You know it!!!
Leading team: Damn…I hate the Hog Press…it’s my lobster roll money and we won fair and square! Come on Mr. Crackles…we can do it!
His partner: it’s ok little buddy…you’re binky buddy is here for you!
His partner: You know it!!!
Leading team: Damn…I hate the Hog Press…it’s my lobster roll money and we won fair and square! Come on Mr. Crackles…we can do it!
His partner: it’s ok little buddy…you’re binky buddy is here for you!
by Just another clown June 16, 2020