7 definitions by Juan Non-lamestain

1) A person who combines the negative traits of a sweatbeatle and a dickweed;


2) A term of disparagement-- commonly used among robots.
I used to believe in 9/11 conspiracies, but then I decided not to be a sweatbeatle-dickweed.
by Juan Non-lamestain August 8, 2008
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A fake Gen-X/Seattle-Scene slang term for an uncool person. Invented when Grunge went national.
Frank Rich of the "New York Times" bought all that stuff about Seattle-speak? Wow! What a lamestain.
by Juan Non-lamestain June 19, 2008
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The inexplicable tendency of people to obsess about a dead rock musician whom they don't like, to the point of wasting their time bashing him on irrelevant websites. Thought by psychotherapists to stem from sexual confusion.
Wow, I'm sick of all these lamestains who post negative crap about Nirvana on Youtube and Urban Dictionary. Too bad about the Cobain effect, iddnit?
by Juan Non-lamestain July 11, 2008
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The unwanted love-child of a brief fling between Gary, IN, and a rural village in Sicily.
If the mob ran Gary, it would be just like Youngstown; except for the Penguins.
by Juan Non-lamestain July 11, 2008
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1) A formerly great, formerly Roman Catholic university. Its board of Trustees decided at the turn of the millenium that it was more important to climb up the rankings at USNWR than to maintain its distinctive mission and identity. As a result of its rapid secularization, it climbed from #18 to #18.

2) A college that can afford to sacrifice its Catholic character, due to the large number of young Catholics who are nevertheless anxious to spend four years and $200K on the experience of living in the empty space between Gary and Toledo.

3) The place where Rev. John Jenkins walks with a cell-phone on his ear so he can pretend to be in the middle of a conversation. This enables him to cross any quad (even South) without having to talk to actual people.

4) A Catholic-college-based theme park in the Upper Midwest, featuring 'Touchdown Jesus,' 'Fair Catch Corby,' 'Play-Action Pass Pope Cletus,' and 'Illegal Formation Ss. Boris and Gleb.' No one knows why.

5) Two lakes an hour's drive east of Gary.

6) A reflecting pond in front of a library with practically no windows and totally depressing study carrels sporting graffiti such as "Re-Elect President Hoover" and "Bring this Rail-Road Contraption to South Bend!"

7) A mythical location, found on no known map, where Zahmbies urinate on other people's dorms, and the upper-administration don WWI-era German infantry helmets and stand in St. Mary's Lake on alternate Tuesdays in order to improve the USNWR standing.
Look, Dunstan! Isn't that Fr. Jenkins standing in a lake with a pointy helmet? We must be at Notre Dame!

Great, Akhbar! I can't wait to see 'Illegal Formation Ss. Boris and Gleb.'
by Juan Non-lamestain July 11, 2008
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Wow, look at the pamel toe on The Pam! I bet L. Ron Hubbard would hit that! Except he's still dead!
by Juan Non-lamestain July 20, 2008
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Practitioner of a martial art developed as a means of countering Samurai military power and monopoly of single-edged swords. Erroneously thought by many to have evolved in Japan. Revealed in "Batman Begins" to actually be practiced way up in the mountains in Tibet, thus rendering Ninjas safe from any surprise attacks from the Samurai, who did not live in China.
Hello Bruce Wayne! I am an Irish Ninja living in the Himalayas, and I am here to teach you to be Batman!

WTF? You aren't going to burn down dad's mansion, are you, you crazy lamestain?
by Juan Non-lamestain August 2, 2008
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