Jim Birtwisle's definitions

type cast

To presume that an actor or actress will assume a character akin to that for which they have previously become famous. A good example is Matt Le Blanc. Having become so famous for his laid back, butt of all jokes character Joey in the tired US comedy Friends, it becomes hard to take him seriously in any other type of role.

Mike: Shall we rent 'Lost in Space'?

James: (hysterical laughter) Look, it's Joey on the cover trying to look hard!

Mike: Yeah, I guess he has been type cast

by Jim Birtwisle January 18, 2008

Wetherspoons

A chain of pubs throughouth Britain that act as a magnet for chavs and minors. Invariably centre stage for all fighting due to the lack of entertainment allowing low priced alcohol and thus large concentrations of both men and women that enjoy violence.

Dude, Where's Mickey?

Oh he fancied a fight so he went up to the Wetherspoons

by Jim Birtwisle January 17, 2008

Playdo fists

A fat persons hand upon making a fist. Because of the excess fat around the hands, knuckles are not defined. This means the fist is blob like and sometimes they have small dimples where pronounced knuckles can be found on the hand of a person of average build. This gives the appearence of a childs sculpting of a hand from child friendly Playdo modelling clay.

Having Playdo fists restricts the owners ability to deliver an effective punch if needed.

As Lucy sat writing her essay I noticed she had playdo fists

by Jim Birtwisle December 7, 2007

bang in your face

Used by Radio 1 (UK) DJ Tim Westwood (see wigger). The phrase is used to denote a track or compilation of tracks that Mr Westwood believes you may enjoy. The phrase, along with others are most commonly shouted in an over exaggerated manner.

This album is full of the latest licks and big hip-hop things. This album will BANG IN YOUR FACE!!!!!

by Jim Birtwisle January 22, 2008

traveller

An alcoholic beverage, usually a tin of lager that is taken for consumption on public transport en route to the pub/bar/club

John, taking any travellers for the train?

by Jim Birtwisle January 16, 2008

Scatch

A sub-standard beach game involving two small round velcro pads strapped flat against the palm of the hand and a fluffy tennis ball. It took the British beach holiday by storm in the nineties until it's flaws came to light. These being that the pads were useless if they came into contact with sand and the ball likewise with water. There were many children left dissapointed with Scatch, I was one of them.

Look at those two kids over there, their Scatch isn't working either!

by Jim Birtwisle March 14, 2008

tom cruise

4ft 2' tall actor brainwashed into scientology. His film characters have a continuing theme that can be broken down into 3 clearly identifiable segments:

1)Beginning - He is the best at what he does (such as flying planes or driving cars)

2)Middle - Has a crisis of confidence (such as a friend dying) but meets love interest who helps him.

3)Ending - Pulls through it and returns to being the best at what he does (such as being a pilot).

Tom Cuise is now perhaps most famous for his sham marriage to Katie Holmes and being a couch jumping Scientologist who doesn't like being squirted with water.

Richard: I saw a Tom Cruise film last night

James: Which one?

Richard: I can't remember exactly, it started with him being the best at what he did, he had a crisis of confidence, but pulled through it in the end.

James: Well that doesn't narrow it down at all!

Richard: Y-You're a jerk, you're a jerk!

by Jim Birtwisle February 5, 2008