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Jake 's definitions

self-gasoholic

one who enjoys the smell of his or her own farts.
by Jake November 8, 2003
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pube strangler

One who makes a rope entirely out of human pubes, and then strangles someone. Sometimes for extra humiliation before killing a victim, a pube strangler may rip out the victim's own pubes, and then proceed with strangling him or her.
Harry: Whoa. I hear there's a fucking pube strangler on the loose.

Dillon: Yeah. That shits crazy. He already killed Chad and Molly. We better lock our doors.
by JakE May 21, 2007
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mustang

For all you inbred, rice chomping, English language challenged morons who seem to think a Mustang is slow, I just love the looks I get when my 03 Mach 1 toasts those little Jap and European pieces of shit! Then they try and accuse me of running NAWS, dumb bastards need to wake the fuck up and realize that a Mustang will waste 95% of the vehicles on the road without breaking a sweat, or any parts for that matter! Maybe a V6 can't get the job done, but there is a Mustang model somewhere along the line that can, ie GT, Mach 1, Cobra, Cobra R, Roush, Saleen. So go grab hold of that bleacher-seat metal wing, stick your little weenies in your big old fart cans and hump those little Asian vibrators for all your worth, 'cause that's the only way your gonna feel like a man.
That Mustang beat my 350Z, he must be spraying!
by Jake December 24, 2003
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four finger fattie

a whale fuck, sealfuck, or chubby troll that you can get not one, not two, not just 3, but 4 fingers into the moment you get her panties off, without even engaging in foreplay yet
That whale Marcy is a four finger fattie, I know because I found out last night after we downed a 6-pack between us.
by Jake March 17, 2004
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gay bobby

someone that acts feminine and stupid at all times
by Jake January 7, 2005
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cum slinger

That Jake is a real cum slinger; he was with Janet on Thursday night, then Nancii on Friday, and now Saturday night he's off humping someone's wife while the husband is working nightshift
by Jake March 5, 2004
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mercy mission

going out in response to a booty call from a fat woman
"I'm on a mercy mission, Fat Wanda just gave me a booty call, she's so horny she can't sleep, and needs some relief in the form of an injection from me."
by Jake March 23, 2004
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